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“Francine, my mother is not manipulating me. Our relationship is completely normal. And if you keep upsetting me, then I'll have to retreat to my safe place between her breasts.”
— Stan Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: Oedipal Panties
Tagged: Mother Issues, manipulation, Safe Place, breasts, Relationship
“It's like Goodnight Moon for adults. With blow jobs!”
— Liza Miller, Younger, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Ekk
“Don't be sorry, you should be with someone your own age who will go agro on you and will put your penis in a cage, but that's not me.”
— Liza Miller, Younger, Season 2: The Mao Function
Tagged: penis, Go Be Free!, Breaking Up With You
“Liza: Thank you for keeping my secret. 

Josh: Yeah, well. Some secrets are worth keeping.”
— Liza Miller, Younger, Season 2: Like a Boss
Tagged: Secrets
“Steve, it's a beautiful afternoon. Shouldn't you be outside with your friends turning my tool shed into Mordor or Endor or... something heartbreaking?”
— Stan Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: Frannie 911
Tagged: Diss, Heartbreaking, Friends, Mordor, nerd
“I'm bringing a blue-collar companion to a black-tie event.”
— Diana Trout, Younger, Season 5: Sex, Liza and Rock & Roll
Tagged: Fancy Parties
“Just because snow is the same color as our refrigerator, doesn't mean you know how it works.”
— Stan Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: The Most Adequate Christmas Ever
Tagged: Snow, Diss, Refrigerator, appliances, How it works
“Doctor says I have a big, spongy cervix. Oh, listen to me bragging about my vagina. It's last week's PTA meeting all over again.”
— Francine Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: Surro-Gate
Tagged: Cervix, bragging, Vagina, PTA, doctor, Pride
“I’ve been an I don’t know guy all my life. It’s never let me down.”
— Jack Stone, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 1
Tagged: I Don't Know, Not Knowing, Not Being Arrogant
“What we’re gonna do when we’re done here, just so you know, is run some tests. You know why? Because you’re a crime scene, Nasir. Just like the house, and the cab, and Andrea, and it’s our job to collect everything we can from a crime scene. And here’s what we’re gonna find, if you ask me. Her in the cab, the cab on her, you in the house, the house on you, you on her, her on you, the knife on you, her on the knife.”
— Dennis Box, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 1
“Survival in here is all about your alliances.”
— Freddy Knight, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 4
Tagged: Prison Life, Prison, How To Survive In Prison
“The night Naz was arrested, he lost a lot. He lost his freedom to return home to his family, to his school, to his night job that helps pay for that school. But what he didn’t lose, and what none of us can lose, were his Constitutional rights to an attorney, to a fair and impartial trial by you, his peers, and to the presumption of his innocence beyond a reasonable doubt.”
— Jack Stone, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 8
“Any lawyer who comes to you with the words I guarantee! is a liar.”
— Jack Stone, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 3
Tagged: Lawyers, I Hate Lawyers
“Lois: Well, hi, there, sweetie!

Stewie: You know, Mother, life is like a box of chocolates: You never know what you're going to get. Your life, however, is more like a box of active grenades!”
— Stewie Griffin, Family Guy, Season 1: Death Has a Shadow
Tagged: insults, humor, I Hate You Mom, Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates, Sassy, Snarky
“ Damn you, woman, awake from your damnable reverie!”
— Stewie Griffin, Family Guy, Season 1: Mind Over Murder
Tagged: Damn you, woman, Frustration, Damn, insults, I Hate You Mom
“Ralph Kramden: Nobody's one hundred percent, Alice.

Alice Kramden: You are. You've been wrong every time!”
— Ralph Kramden, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Six Months To Live
Tagged: insults
“It’s like having a nuclear arsenal. You don’t want to use it, but if the other side knows you got it, they tend to come to the table sooner.”
— Jack Stone, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 4
Tagged: Examples of Similes
“Ralph: Just remember, you can't put you arms around a memory.

Alice: I can't even put my arms around you.”
— Alice Kramden, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Pickles
Tagged: Fat-Shaming, Memories
“Wow he is rough on you. He is elephant-making-love-to-a-cat rough on you.”
— Roger The Alien, American Dad!, Season 4: The 42-Year-Old Virgin
Tagged: rough, Sex, Making Love
“A lot of time you just do what you gotta do, or you do what everybody wants you to do.”
— Nasir Khan, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 1
Tagged: Just Going With The Motions
“Ralph Kramden: Two thousand dollars, Alice! That's big, big, big! This is probably the biggest thing I ever got into.

Alice Kramden: The biggest thing you ever got into was your pants.”
— Ralph Kramden, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Pickles
Tagged: Fat-Shaming
“If I turn you upside down, how much weed is gonna fall out?”
— Dennis Box, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 1
Tagged: Weed, Marijuana
“Oh, hey, Nicole. How you doing? I thought the bleeding ulcers would have got you by now.”
— Billy McBride, Goliath, Season 1: Cover Your Ass
Tagged: Sarcasm
“Ralph Kramden: We spend $200, we make $2000 and the profit is 1800. We can't lose.

Ed Norton: Can't lose, huh? That's what you said when you bought the parking lot next to where they were building up the movie house there. You said, 'People going to the movies got to have a place to park their car.'

Ralph Kramden: How did I know they were building a drive-in theater?”
— Ralph Kramden, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Pickles
Tagged: drive-in theater, profit motive, Get Rich Quick Schemes
“You know, one of the things you miss in here is being able to say good night to someone that’s not an animal in a fucking zoo.”
— Nasir Khan, The Night Of, Season 1: Part 6
Tagged: Prison Life
“Hayley: That dream is a warning. Society's trying to brainwash me to conform, to color inside the lines, to get married and have babies. Well I'm not drinking the Kool-Aid anymore.

Francine: Have you tried it with Splenda?”
— Hayley Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: Haylias
Tagged: Dream, Society, Brainwash, Marriage, Babies on Planes, Splenda
“Alice Kramden: Trixie hasn't had any sleep in three nights. If she doesn't get some rest soon, she's just gonna waste away to nothing.

Ralph Kramden: She didn't have any sleep in three nights? How about me? I haven't slept in three nights! She'll waste away? Don't you care if I waste away?

Alice Kramden: Yes, I care, Ralph! But you wouldn't waste away if you stayed awake for nine years.

Ralph Kramden: How would you like to waste away on the moon?”
— Alice Kramden, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Cold
Tagged: Insomnia, Fat-Shaming
“Ed Norton: [Ralph tries to figure out what to leave Alice in his will] Look, as long as you're going, anyway, why don't you sell your body to science? If they pay by the pound, she'll be left a millionaire!

Ralph: Why don't you shut up?”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Masquerade
Tagged: Living Will, Fat-Shaming
“Dick Gersh: Tell me, Dr. Norton, what school did you attend?

Ed Norton: P.S., 31 Oyster Bay.

Dick Gersh: No, I mean, what medical school?

Ralph: Oh, uh, he went to Oxford.

Dick Gersh: Oh, in England.

Ed Norton: Is that where it is?

Dick Gersh: You mean you went to school in Oxford and you don't know it's in England?

Ed Norton: Well, to tell you the truth, sir, it was so foggy over there, I don't know where it was.”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Masquerade
Tagged: Oxford, England, Bluffing, foggy
“Nothing bonds a family like a dark, horrible secret.”
— Francine Smith (voice), American Dad!, Season 4: The Vacation Goo
Tagged: Bonds, Family, dark, horrible, Secret

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About The Authors

This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.

Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.

Kendra Syrdal is a writer, editor, partner, and senior publisher for The Thought & Expression Company. Over the last few years she has been personally responsible for writing, editing, and producing over 30+ million pageviews on Thought Catalog.