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Quotes tagged “Christmas”
Santa: Bumpy sleigh ride... Jack. Next time you get the urge to take over someone else's holiday, I'd listen to her. [points to Sally] She's the only one who makes any sense around this insane asylum! [walks away, muttering]
Santa: Skeletons, boogie men...
Jack Skellington: I hope there's still time.
Santa: To fix Christmas? Of course there is! I'm Santa Claus! [flies out chimney]”
Jack Skellington: No.
[the Mayor switches to his upset face]
Jack Skellington: How jolly!
Mayor: Oh. How jolly our Christmas will be.”
Jess: What are the sexiest holidays in America?
Schmidt: The most sexy holidays are the 4th of July — Independence Day, obviously. Women’s History Month. Christmas.”
Seth: I've got Jesus and Moses on my side, man.”
Seth: Don't worry about it, buddy, because in this house, you don't have to choose. Allow me to introduce you to a little something I like to call... Chrismukkah.”
Claire: Christmas. I don't suppose you hang stockings by the fire.
Jamie: To dry them off, you mean?
Sabrina: Morgan, normal is relative.
Morgan: Yeah, too bad my relatives aren't normal.”
Roxie: The usual. We put up an aluminum tree, get take-out from Taco Bell, and then I watch my Dad and step-mom exchange cartons of Winston Lights.
Morgan: Your family exchanges cigarettes?
Roxie: Hey, it's just not Christmas without a visit from Jolly old St. Nicotine!”
Sabrina: And a crossbow!”
Sheila: How about the dreidel song, boobie?
Kyle: I can sing the Mr. Hankey song.
Mr. Garrison: The Mr. Hankey song, how does that go?
Kyle: [singing] Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, he loves me and I love...
Stan: Christmas poo?
Cartman: What the hell is Christmas poo?!
Kyle: Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, haven't you guys ever heard of it?
Sheila: Kyle, that is enough!
Mr. Garrison: See, that's what you get when you raise your child to be a pagan.
Sheila: Now that does it! I am going straight to the mayor about you Mr. Garrison!
Mr. Garrison: Oh, wait, wait. I'm sorry, was it the pagan remark?”
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This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.
Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.
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