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“Dr. Floss: [holds up a merely a random pattern] What do you see in this picture?

Butt-head: It's this dude, and he's like 'auditioning his finger puppets.' Huh huh.

Beavis: Yeah. Yeah. He's 'shining his helmet.'

Dr. Floss: I see. And what do you see here? [holds up another picture of random shapes]

Butt-head: Whoa…He's really corralling the tadpole.

Beavis: Yeah. Yeah. He's really peelin' some chilis.

Dr. Floss: I see. What about this one? [holds up another picture of no particular shape]

Butt-head: Woah… Leave a little for next time, dude!

Beavis: Yeah. Yeah. He's really, like, having a tug-of-war with Cyclops!

Dr. Floss: I see.”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 4: They're Coming To Take Me Away, Huh Huh
Tagged: Rorschach tests, masturbation
“Beavis: M-80s?

Butt-head: Firecrackers?

[Mexican woman shrugs]

Beavis: Fireworks?

[Mexican woman shrugs]

Butt-head: These people are stupid.”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Way Down Mexico Way
Tagged: Firecrackers, Stupid
“Mr. Stevenson: Are your milkshakes made with real milk and ice cream, or do you use that reconstituted shake mix stuff?

Beavis: Yeah.

Mr. Stevenson: What do you mean? Yeah, you use the shake mix? Or yeah, you use the real stuff?

Beavis: Yeah.

Mr. Stevenson: [sighs] Let me talk to the manager.

Beavis: Yeah.”
— Beavis, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Customers Suck
Tagged: Milk Shakes, Stupid
“I don't like stuff that sucks.”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Customers Suck
Tagged: Sucks, stuff
“I'm gonna slap you around like a redheaded stepchild!”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Baby Makes Uh, Three
Tagged: stepchild, Threats
“Did you know, when you eat rump roast, you're eating a cow's butt?”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Burger World
Tagged: rump roast, cow's butt
“[at a pet store] Do you sell any dead animals?”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Good Credit
Tagged: dead animals
“If you pour salt on a snail, a lot of scientific stuff happens.”
— Beavis, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 2: Scientific Stuff
“What does the president of the United States think about when he goes to the bathroom?”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 4: Rabies Scare
Tagged: President of the United States, bathroom
“Mr. Van Driessen: This is the '90s, people. A '9' upside down is a '6,' so let's turn the '90s upside down and recapture the spirit of the '60s, okay?

Butt-head: Watch those flashbacks, dude.”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 1: Door-to-Door
Tagged: 1960s, 1990s, flashbacks
“Beavis: [sings] Don't wanna fall in mud!

Butt-head: [sings] All I wanna do is sell my blood!

Beavis: What do you think they pay for, like, a gallon of blood?

Butt-head: Just be cool, dude! Don't take their first offer!”
— Butt-head, Beavis and Butt-head, Season 1: Blood Drive
Tagged: blood drive, Negotiation
“Yeah, bitch! Magnets!”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Face Off
Tagged: Bitch, Magnets
“They’re minerals, Marie! Jesus!”
— Hank Schrader, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Open House
Tagged: minerals, jesus
“Stay out of my territory.”
— Walter White, Breaking Bad, Season 2: Over
Tagged: Threats, Territory, turf wars
“Look, let’s start with some tough love. You two suck at peddling meth. Period.”
— Sam Catlin, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Open House
Tagged: Tough Love, peddling meth, you suck
“So roll me further, bitch.”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 3: I See You
Tagged: roll me, Bitch
“Just because you shot Jesse James, don’t make you Jesse James.”
— Mike Ehrmantraut, Breaking Bad, Season 5: Hazard Pay
Tagged: jesse james, I Knew Jack Kennedy
“We’re done when I say we’re done.”
— Walter White, Breaking Bad, Season 5: Live Free or Die
Tagged: It's Not Over
“Yo, Gatorade me, bitch.”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 3: Fly
Tagged: gatorade, Bitch
“Yeah, Mr. White! Yeah, science!”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 1: A No-Rough-Stuff Type Deal
Tagged: Meth, Science, dumb
“If you try to interfere, this becomes a much simpler matter. I will kill your wife. I will kill your son. I will kill your infant daughter.”
— Gus Fring, Breaking Bad, Season 5: Felina
Tagged: Threats, Murder
“How do you look bad exactly? Where is the ‘I slept with my boss’ bullet point? Because I can't seem to find that anywhere.”
— Walter White, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Bullet Points
Tagged: Bullet Point, Sleeping With The Boss
“That’s what the kids call ‘epic fail.’”
— Saul Goodman, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Problem Dog
Tagged: Epic Fail, kids
“I'M A BLOWFISH! BLOWFISH! YEEEAAAH! BLOWFISHIN' THIS UP!”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 2: Negro Y Azul
Tagged: blowfish, I'm a blowfish
“Fuck you, and your eyebrows!”
— Walter White, Breaking Bad, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Fuck You, Eyebrows
“Everyone sounds like Meryl Streep with a gun to their head.”
— Mike Ehrmantraut, Breaking Bad, Season 5: Dead Freight
Tagged: Meryl Streep, Fear, Gun
“Wipe down this!”
— Walter White, Breaking Bad, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: cancer
“This is my own private domicile and I will not be harassed...bitch!”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 3: Sunset
Tagged: Private Domicile, Harassment, Bitch
“If you’re committed enough, you can make any story work. I once told a woman I was Kevin Costner, and it worked because I believed it.”
— Saul Goodman, Breaking Bad, Season 3: Abiquiu
Tagged: Committed, pretending, Acting, Kevin Costner
“We’re all on the same page. The one that says, if I can’t kill you, you’ll sure as shit wish you were dead.”
— Jesse Pinkman, Breaking Bad, Season 4: Box Cutter
Tagged: Same Page, Kill, dead, Shit

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About The Authors

This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.

Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.

Kendra Syrdal is a writer, editor, partner, and senior publisher for The Thought & Expression Company. Over the last few years she has been personally responsible for writing, editing, and producing over 30+ million pageviews on Thought Catalog.