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Quotes tagged “Cigarettes”

“Every cigarette still thrills me. The zing, the smell, the trail of vapor beside me, as if I am a tiny airplane. And I am a tiny airplane, going off on a brief trip to bliss.”
— Susanna Kaysen, Bright Leaf
Tagged: smoking, Nicotine, In Praise of Smoking, Cigarettes
“Grandpa: What the... what the hell is this?

John: That's lite beer.

Grandpa: Gee, I weigh ninety goddamn pounds, and you bring me this sloppin' foam?

John: Ariel's got me on a diet because the doc said my cholesterol's a little too high.

Grandpa: Well let me tell you something now, Johnny. Last Thursday, I turned 95 years old. And I never exercised a day in my life. Every morning, I wake up, and I smoke a cigarette. And then I eat five strips of bacon. And for lunch, I eat a bacon sandwich. And for a midday snack?

John: Bacon.

Grandpa: Bacon! A whole damn plate! And I usually drink my dinner. Now according to all of them flat-belly experts, I should've took a dirt nap like thirty years ago. But each year comes and goes, and I'm still here. Ha! And they keep dyin'. You know? Sometimes I wonder if God forgot about me. Just goes to show you, huh?

John: What?

Grandpa: Huh?

John: Goes to show you what?

Grandpa: Well it just goes... what the hell are you talkin' about?

John: Well you said you drink beer, you eat bacon and you smoke cigarettes, and you outlive most of the experts.

Grandpa: Yeah?

John: I thought maybe there was a moral.

Grandpa: No, there ain't no moral. I just like that story. That's all. Like that story.”
— Grandpa Gustafson, Grumpier Old Men
Tagged: Cholesterol, Lite Beer, Cigarettes, Bacon, weight loss
“Shaun: Well maybe one should do the other, and then do themselves.

Liz: Oh maybe you should do me, I’ll only muck it up if I have to do myself. [Shaun mimes shooting Liz and then himself, to see how it feels]

Shaun: You know, I don’t think I’ve got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mum, and my girlfriend all in the same night.

Liz: [pauses] What makes you think I’d have taken you back?

Shaun: Well...you don’t want to die single, do you?

Ed: [interrupting] That’s it. I would like to be shot.

Shaun: Besides, I’ve changed. I haven’t had a fag since yesterday, I promise!

Ed: He hasn’t.”
— Shaun, Shaun of the Dead
Tagged: Cigarettes, Mortality
“Just when you think it can't get any worse, you run out of cigarettes.”
— Carol Aird, Carol
Tagged: Cigarettes, LGBT Movies
“Sylvia: Why don't you smoke?

Sal: I don't want the cancer.”
— Salvatore "Sal" Naturale, Dog Day Afternoon
Tagged: Cigarettes, smoking, cancer, Lung Cancer
“I hardly ever smoked a cigarette. I bought these thin cheroots because you didn't have to inhale. I would puff on them, but I eventually gave them up because I was burning holes in my sweaters. People read into the fact that I called the character Mary Jane, but honestly, I had no idea it was a nickname for marijuana. I never understood why people take drugs. They're habit forming, and they can kill you. I didn't need anything to pep me up or make me feel more creative, and I didn't need them to help me with women.”
— Stan Lee
Tagged: Comic Books, Marijuana, Cigarettes, Mary Jane, Drugs
“Where's my goddamn cigarette? What's wrong with this picture!”
— Dr. Grace Augustine, Avatar
Tagged: Cigarettes, Sassy, upset
“Char Man: Want a cigarette?

Adam: No, thank you.

Char Man: I'm trying to cut down myself.”
— Adam Maitland, Beetlejuice
Tagged: Cigarettes
“Jay: So let's have a butt.

Max: No thanks, I don't smoke.

Ernie 'Ice': They're very health-conscious in Los Angeles. [Jay and Ice laugh]

Jay: You got any cash, Hollywood?

Max: No.

Ernie 'Ice': Gee, we don't get any smokes from you. We don't get any cash. What am I supposed to do with my afternoon?

Max: Maybe you could learn to breathe through your nose. [Jay laughs but stops as Ice offensively glares at him]

Jay: Whoa. Check out the new cross-trainers.

Ernie 'Ice': [looks at Max's sneakers] Cool. [turns to Max] Let me try them on. [Max tries to leave, Jay stops him and smiles]

Jay: Later, dude!

Ernie 'Ice': See you, Hollywood! [Jay and Ernie laughing]”
— Ernie / 'Ice', Hocus Pocus
Tagged: Cigarettes, Los Angeles
“Every man has his weakness. Mine was always just cigarettes.”
— Cigarette Smoking Man, The X-Files, Season 10: My Struggle II
Tagged: Weakness, Cigarettes
“Mad Sweeney: Your heart's not beating for this life anymore, dead wife. This life is done.

Laura: Only felt my heart beat one time since I died. When I kissed Shadow.

Mad Sweeney: That doesn't obligate him to feel shit. You're so worried about being alive, but to him you're already dead. Wait, you kissed him?

Laura: Yeah I just said I kissed him.

Mad Sweeney: Put your tongue in his mouth?

Laura: Just the tip.

Mad Sweeney: Was it cold and dry?

Laura: Probably.

Mad Sweeney: Did it taste like cigarettes and vomit?

Laura: I have been smoking... Perhaps I misjudged the kiss. Probably should've had some gum or a mint.”
— Laura Moon, American Gods, Season 1: A Murder of Gods
Tagged: kiss, Relationships, dead, Heartbeat, Dark Humor, Cigarettes, Regret
“Jimbo: Okay, each of you young'uns take a gun, a beer, and some smokes.

Cartman: Hey! I didn't get a gun! [Jimbo gives a rifle to Cartman] Sweet. This is like the gun I used in 'Nam.

Stan: You weren't in Vietnam, Cartman!

Ned: Were you stationed in DA Nang?

Stan: Cartman always makes stuff up, Ned, you can't believe anything he says.

Cartman: Hey! I'll blow your frigging head off!

Jimbo: Hey, look out, son, that's dangerous! You're gonna spill your beer!”
— Eric Cartman, South Park, Season 1: Volcano
Tagged: Guns, Beer, Cigarettes, Vietnam, Threats, danger
“I never had a real house to grow up in. You know, home. I never belonged anywhere. And all my life, I was looking for that thing, you know. Thinking that it was out there somewhere. That all I had to do was find it. But I think, maybe, that home was us. It was you and me, together in that stupid car, riding around, smoking cigarettes. I think that was everything.”
— Sarah Linden, The Killing, Season 4: Eden
Tagged: Love, Home, Life, US, Car, Cigarettes, Everything
“I don't drink anymore. That was always my biggest problem. I never did cocaine or any of those things. Alcohol was always my enemy, for as far back as I can remember. When I quit drinking and quit smoking cigarettes, a lot of my problems went away.”
— Willie Nelson, Willie Nelson Revisits Old Standards for New ‘Classic’
Tagged: Drinking, Alcoholism, Cocaine, Cigarettes
“I had gotten up to two, maybe three, packs (of cigarettes) a day. And my lungs were bothering me and I'd had pneumonia two or three times. And I was also smoking pot, and I decided, well, one of them's got to go. And so I took a pack of Chesterfields and took all the Chesterfields out, rolled up 20 big fat ones and put it in there, and I haven't smoked a cigarette since then.”
— Willie Nelson
Tagged: Cigarettes, smoking, Addiction, Chesterfields, Smoking Pot
“In church I was told that if I so much as smoked a cigarette or tasted alcohol, I’d be damned in hell for all eternity…it didn’t take long for me to start thinking that sounded all wrong….I didn’t cotton to the idea that your religion should be flaunted to other people. Your religion is for you, and is best kept close to your heart.”
— Willie Nelson
Tagged: Church, smoking, Drinking, Cigarettes, Alcohol, Sin, Religion
“You know when a cigarette is best? After sex with me.”
— Jack Fahey, Criminal Minds, Season 6: Lauren
Tagged: Cigarettes, Sex, Afterglow
“Did the disappointed smoker get everything he wanted for Christmas? Clothes but no cigar.”
— Unknown, 30 Awfully Corny Jokes For People Who Have A Cheesy Sense Of Humor
Tagged: Smokers, Cigarettes, cigar, Puns, Christmas
“Everyone smokes. You're only a rebel if you don't.”
— Kyle, Shameless, Shameless Season 3: May I Trim Your Hedges?
Tagged: smoking, Cigarettes, Anti-Conformist
“I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.”
— Benny Hill, Stop Smoking
Tagged: smoking, Cigarettes, Dating, humor

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This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.

Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.

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