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Fargo

Total quotes (51)

Fargo

A close-knit anthology series dealing with stories involving malice, violence and murder based in and around Minnesota.

Watch Fargo online

Genres:	Crime, Drama, Thriller
Number Of Seasons:	3
Network:	FX
Created By:	Noah Hawley
User Score (votes):	8.3 / 10 (813)

DirectorAdam Arkin

DirectorAdam Bernstein

Costume DesignCarol Case

DirectorColin Bucksey

DirectorDearbhla Walsh

Executive ProducerEthan Coen

Original Music ComposerJeff Russo

DirectorJeffrey Reiner

Executive ProducerJoel Coen

DirectorJohn Cameron

DirectorKeith Gordon

DirectorMatt Shakman

DirectorMichael Uppendahl

DirectorMike Barker

Executive ProducerNoah Hawley

CastingRachel Tenner

DirectorRandall Einhorn

DirectorScott Winant

Executive ProducerWarren Littlefield

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Writers often seen in this show:

Ben Nedivi, Bob DeLaurentis, Glenn Howerton, Matt Wolpert, Monica Beletsky, Noah Hawley, Steve Blackman

Fargo Characters

Season 1 Quotes

Season 2 Quotes

Season 3 Quotes

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Total quotes (51)

Buck, if I wanted an opinion from an asshole, I'd ask my own. Got it?

— Ray Stussy (Ewan McGregor), Fargo, Season 3: The Narrow Escape Problem

Opinion asshole

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Gus Grimly: They're gonna give me a citation for bravery.

Greta Grimly: You? Come on, you're afraid of spiders.

Gus Grimly: Buzz Aldrin was afraid of spiders, and he went into space.

— Greta Grimly (Joey King), Fargo, Season 1: Morton's Fork

Buzz Aldrin Spiders Arachnophobia Bravery

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Your problem is you spent your whole life thinking there are rules. There aren't.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: The Crocodile's Dilemma

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Hanzee Dent: No drugs, your dad says. Says anyone sells to you gets the axe.

Simone Gerhardt: Geez, you're all a bunch of squares. Sometimes a girl just wants to bust a nut, ya know?

— Hanzee Dent ( Zahn Tokiya-ku McClarnon ), Fargo, Season 2: The Myth of Sisyphus

Drugs bust a nut squares

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Son, I could fill out a steamer trunk with the amount of stupid I think you are.

— Hank Larrson (Ted Danson), Fargo, Season 2: Rhinoceros

Stupid insults Sick Burns

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Jeb Cheney: You Minnesota boys don't got much in the way of backbone, now, do ya?

Hank Larsson: Well, now, I wouldn't say that. Just like to think things through.

— Sheriff Hank Larsson (Ted Danson), Fargo, Season 2: The Castle

Minnesota Backbone

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Mister, we're not friends. I mean, maybe we will be someday. But I gotta say, if that were me in your position? I would have killed that man.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: The Crocodile's Dilemma

Friends Empathy

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Saint Lawrence. Patron saint of hard asses. Burned alive by the Romans. You know what he said? ‘Turn me over. I'm done on this side.’ That's a goddamn saint.

— Stavros Milos (Oliver Platt), Fargo, Season 1: A Muddy Road

Saint Lawrence Romans Burned Alive Bravery Hard Asses

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Well, I'm saying that the Romans raised by wolves, they see a guy turning water into wine, what do they do? They eat him. 'Cause there are no saints in the animal kingdom. Only breakfast and dinner.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: The Six Ungraspables

saints Animal Kingdom Romans wolves

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This is a community. People watch each other's backs. Someone gets sick, someone dies, you bring a casserole, help.

— Ari Ziskind (Byron Noble), Fargo, Season 1: The Six Ungraspables

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Nobody killed a judge. We own all the judges. What'd be the point of killing one?

— Dodd Gerhardt (Jeffrey Donovan), Fargo, Season 2: The Myth of Sisyphus

Judges judicial corruption payoffs Bribery

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Nikki Swango: Ray, there's a man in my bathroom.

Ray Stussy: Let's not jump to any conclusions.

Nikki Swango: Are you saying he's not a man or he's not in my bathroom?

— Nikki Swango (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), Fargo, Season 3: The Law of Vacant Places

Misheard jumping to conclusions

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Hotel clerk: Room 203. Very nice room, very nice. It's got air conditioning. You can smell the ocean.

Gloria Burgle: There's a view?

Hotel clerk: No, there's a smell. At low tide.

— Gloria Burgle (Carrie Coon), Fargo, Season 3: The Law of Non-Contradiction

hotels Smells Ocean

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Dodd Gerhardt: You got till tomorrow to bring the collection money you owe.

Rye Gerhardt: Or what?

Dodd Gerhardt: You make me wait for you again, I'll cleave your skull.

— Dodd Gerhardt (Jeffrey Donovan), Fargo, Season 2: Waiting for Dutch

collection money Extortion Death Threats

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She was a true gloom, my mother. We used to eat in the dark. For a laugh, I wrote on her tombstone, 'Here lies Barbara Milligan, happy till the end.' Me, on the other hand, I'm an optimist.

— Mike Milligan (Bokeem Woodbine), Fargo, Season 2: The Gift of the Magi

gloom bummer depressing Tombstone Epitaph Prank Irony

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Bear Gerhardt: There's gonna be a reckoning one day, brother. All souls are called to account for their actions. In the end, we all get what we deserve.

Dodd Gerhardt: You keep telling yourself that.

— Bear Gerhardt (Angus Sampson), Fargo, Season 2: The Gift of the Magi

Reckoning Karma Souls last judgment

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Ed Blomquist: Today's your lucky day, Mike. I've got Dodd Gerhardt in the trunk of my car. You want him?

Mike Milligan: Sir, if I kiss you when we meet, would that be inappropriate?

— Ed Blomquist (Jesse Plemons), Fargo, Season 2: Loplop

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Vern Thurman: You'll make a good chief one day.

Molly Solverson: Me? What about Bill? He's got seniority.

Vern Thurman: Bill cleans his gun with bubble bath. No, it'll be you.

— Molly Solverson (Allison Tolman), Fargo, Season 1: The Crocodile's Dilemma

chief Seniority Gun Bubble Bath

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A million dollars? He killed my damn dog and now he wants a million dollars? ‘Eat a turd’ is my response.

— Stavros Milos (Oliver Platt), Fargo, Season 1: A Muddy Road

Million Dollars dog turd

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Of course no one hangs the sad pictures. Am I right? Mom crying and dad looking angry. Kid with a black eye.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: A Fox, a Rabbit, and a Cabbage

sad pictures Crying angry Domestic Violence Child Abuse

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A whore's life is five good years, five bad years, and then some half-dick sweat stain grinds you out like a cigarette. Like a goddamn spent cigarette.

— Dodd Gerhardt (Jeffrey Donovan), Fargo, Season 2: Rhinoceros

Whore Prostitute used up dick small dick cigarette

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Postal Worker: This is highly irregular.

Lorne Malvo: No, highly irregular is the time I found a human foot in a toaster oven. This is just odd.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: The Rooster Prince

Irregular dismemberment

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Molly Solverson: You talk a lot, you know that?

Lou Solverson: It's always been a problem.

— Molly Solverson (Allison Tolman), Fargo, Season 1: The Rooster Prince

Problem talking

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Burt Canton: She stopped putting it in her mouth soon as the ring went on her finger.

Lorne Malvo: Well, that's a national tragedy, Burt.

— Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton), Fargo, Season 1: A Fox, a Rabbit, and a Cabbage

blowjobs Marriage Dead Bedrooms national tragedy

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Rye Gerhardt: I'm a man.

Dodd Gerhardt: You're the comic in a piece of bubble gum!

— Dodd Gerhardt (Jeffrey Donovan), Fargo, Season 2: Waiting for Dutch

Man Bubble Gum comic Insult unmanly

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Fargo Characters