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Kendra Syrdal

3,632 Quotes
three be the things I shall never attain: envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
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3,632 quotes curated by Kendra Syrdal:

“Currently getting a pedicure. Or as I call it '30 minutes of trying to not kick someone in the face because I am baby level ticklish'.”
— Mamrie Hart, Twitter
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Pedicures, Ticklish
“Last week I was feeling exhausted, a little depressed, and self-indulgent and I said to my boyfriend, 'What's the point of working so hard if you can't have millions of puppies?'”
— Lena Dunham, The Ellen Show
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Animals, Animal Lover
“There are so many things that I would be so afraid to do. Like hike Mount Kilimanjaro or go to a CrossFit gym.”
— Lena Dunham, The Ellen Show
Tagged: Women in Comedy, fears
“Some people are not meant to be mothers and some people are not meant to drive.”
— Lena Dunham, The Ellen Show
Tagged: Women in Comedy
“With kids it's so funny because they're not strong enough to kill you. But they want to kill you so bad.”
— Tina Fey, Tina Fey on Letterman
Tagged: Women in Comedy, kids, Jokes, Parenthood
“I'll work for a hamburger.”
— Kate McKinnon, The Hollywood Reporter Roundtable
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Working
“If I had Instagram it would just be pictures of my son. Who is a cat.”
— Kate McKinnon, The Hollywood Reporter Roundtables
Tagged: Women in Comedy, cats, Social Media
“I was going to make this new rule for myself 'no sex on the first date' that my new rule. So I quit dating.”
— Nikki Glaser, Women Who Kill
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Sex, Sex on the first date
“You know what happened to Oprah at 23? She got fired. Imagine firing Oprah. It wasn't a mistake. Because she wasn't Oprah. She was just some 23-year-old punk who needed to get fired so she could become Oprah.”
— Leslie Jones, Weekend Update
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Oprah, Dreams, Life Lessons
“I ain't no damsel in distress. You can go get the car baby while I handle these three thug muthafuckas.”
— Leslie Jones, Problem Child
Tagged: Women in Comedy, Damsel in Distress