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50 Dangerous Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused By Your Boyfriend

You feel helpless, like you're trapped in the relationship. 
Holly Riordan
November 8, 2016
“You feel like you need permission to make decisions or go out somewhere.”
— Barrie Davenport, via twitter.com
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Permission, Allowed
“They try to control the finances and how you spend money.”
— Barrie Davenport, via twitter.com
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, finances, Control, Money
“They withhold sex as a way to manipulate and control.”
— Barrie Davenport, via twitter.com
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Sex, manipulation, Control
“Seems like everyone is complimenting your new wardrobe, recent weight loss, or latest blogpost. Everyone, that is, except the one person who should be leading the cheering section. Your emotionally abusive partner is far more invested in tearing you down and keeping you down. He really doesn’t want you feeling good about yourself. If you do, you might realize you could do better elsewhere. So, instead of loving praise, you’ll get reactions that take you down a notch or two. Or ten.”
— Abby Rodman, You’re Not Going Crazy: 5 Sure Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Wardrobe, compliments, Praise
“You’re really sad about putting your dog down, your uncle’s illness, or losing that road race. You could really use a shoulder to cry on. But you know you can’t rely on your partner for that. In order to stay in control, emotional abusers need your focus to be on them. Their tolerance for your woes is limited because they need to quickly get back to their fix: abusing you. A loving partner is your soft place to land, and will grieve life’s losses right alongside you. If your partner isn’t there for you in the tough times, take note.”
— Abby Rodman, You’re Not Going Crazy: 5 Sure Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Control, upset
“Her fender bender wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t called just as she pulled out of the driveway. If you hadn’t asked him to help out more with the kids, he could’ve put in more time at work and gotten that promotion. In fact, mostly everything that goes wrong is your fault.”
— Abby Rodman, You’re Not Going Crazy: 5 Sure Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Blame, Fault
“An emotional abuser doesn’t want to hear about your pain, except to reinforce that you deserve whatever pain you feel. That you’ve brought it on yourself, or that it’s your deserved destiny to feel bad about yourself. If your partner indicates they have no time to talk about what worries, scares or inspires you, notice if it’s part of a pattern.”
— Adam Gilad, 37 Signs Of Emotional Abuse In A Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Pain, worries, Fear
“An emotional abuser will exclude you not only from their heart, from their good will and from their approval, they will also exclude you from their activities. If you feel that your partner is making plans without you, if they are taking part in activities without you and if they are keeping secrets from you, disappearing and reappearing at will while refusing to explain their movements, you are likely in a relationship with someone who is abusing you in multiple ways.”
— Adam Gilad, 37 Signs Of Emotional Abuse In A Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Excludes, Friends
“Sometimes an emotional abuser will deliberately lie to you to confuse you and make you doubt your perceptions. They will make you doubt their own observations, memory and sanity. Sometimes they will argue and wear you down until you don’t trust what you know is true.”
— Adam Gilad, 37 Signs Of Emotional Abuse In A Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Lies, Memories, Insanity
“Your partner tells mean, inappropriate and demeaning jokes, with you as the punch line.”
— David Wolfe, 20 Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship You Can't Ignore!
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Jokes, mean, Demeaning
“Your partner blames you for his or her problems, bad moods and overall unhappiness.”
— David Wolfe, 20 Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship You Can't Ignore!
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Unhappy, blaming, Bad Mood
“Your partner constantly calls, texts or even shows up to check up on you to see who you are with and what you’re doing when he or she isn’t around.”
— David Wolfe, 20 Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship You Can't Ignore!
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, calls, texts
“Extramarital affairs.”
— Marni Feuerman, 21 Warning Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship | World of Psychology
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Affairs, Cheating
“Isolating you from friends and family.”
— Marni Feuerman, 21 Warning Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship | World of Psychology
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Isolation, Friends, Family
“Threatening to commit suicide if you leave.”
— Marni Feuerman, 21 Warning Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship | World of Psychology
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Threats, Suicide
“They're so jealous it's Scary. A certain amount of jealousy is pretty normal in most relationships. Having said that, the level of jealous behavior and the reason behind that jealousy does make a difference. It's one thing if your partner gets jealous when someone blatantly hits on you in front of them and you flirt back, but it's a totally different story if they freak out when some random person on your friends list 'likes' a photo of you in a bikini.”
— Elizabeth Enochs, 9 Signs You're Being Emotionally Abused In Your Relationship, Because Love Shouldn't Feel Manipulative
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Jealous, Jealousy, scary
“If your partner is exhibiting inappropriate behavior with people outside of your relationship as a way to control you, punish you, or dictate your relationship, then they are emotionally abusing you and breaking your trust at the same time.”
— Elizabeth Enochs, 9 Signs You're Being Emotionally Abused In Your Relationship, Because Love Shouldn't Feel Manipulative
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, affair, Cheating, Control
“If your partner tends to ignore you when the two of you are together, but the second you go to your parents' for the weekend they suddenly can't stop blowing up your phone, then you should know that's a serious red flag for an emotionally abusive relationship and partner.”
— Elizabeth Enochs, 9 Signs You're Being Emotionally Abused In Your Relationship, Because Love Shouldn't Feel Manipulative
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Ignoring, Texting
“You're afraid to tell your partner about a normal happening - your car needs brakes, your boss made you work overtime - because you're not sure how he will react.”
— Adriana Velez, You're Afraid To Talk To Them About Even The Little Things
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Afraid, Fear, private
“You no longer want to bring your significant other around your friends or family because you're afraid he will berate you and humiliate you in front of your loved ones.”
— Adriana Velez, You're Afraid To Talk To Them About Even The Little Things
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Humiliate, Jokes, Making Fun
“You feel helpless, like you're trapped in the relationship.”
— Adriana Velez, You're Afraid To Talk To Them About Even The Little Things
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, helpless, trapped
“He nonsensically reminds you of the hordes of women who are attracted to him to make you believe it is your job to please him and make him happy at all times, lest he finds someone new.”
— Christina Berchini, 12 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Threats, other women
“He’s the guy who does not leave your dorm/apartment/home when you’ve asked him to. The same goes for the guy who shows up to your home when you have explicitly asked him not to. None of this is cute or endearing. It is offensive and an abuse of your boundaries.”
— Christina Berchini, 12 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, disrespect, boundaries, Offensive
“When you ask him a question about his intentions, does he stutter? Does he talk around the question? It takes approximately zero seconds to communicate the truth. It takes a little longer than that to come up with a passable lie or excuse. Interpret stuttering and dancing around questions for what they reveal: The very real probability that you are not getting the whole story.”
— Christina Berchini, 12 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Communicate, Liar
“Painful comparisons. Your partner constantly compares you, either with your more prettier or successful friends, and tells you how much better than you they are. Your partner may even be subtle and point out to celebrities and tell you how they’re so much more attractive than you.”
— Natalia Avdeeva, 21 Big Signs of Emotional Abuse You May Be Overlooking
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, comparisons, celebs
“Your partner’s behavior and attitude confuses you. At times, they may be extremely loving and caring. And at other times, they’re really mean and hurtful. You just can’t predict how they’ll react to anything you do.”
— Natalia Avdeeva, 21 Big Signs of Emotional Abuse You May Be Overlooking
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Confusion, mixed signals, Hurtful
“Sexual manipulation. Your partner emotionally manipulates you into sexual activities you don’t like. They may even emotionally armtwist you by saying things like ‘Other girls/guys do it! Why can’t you?’”
— Natalia Avdeeva, 21 Big Signs of Emotional Abuse You May Be Overlooking
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, manipulation, peer pressure, Sex
“Alcohol and drug use. Not all abusers use drugs or drink excessive alcohol, but many do. An addiction can lead to erratic and innappropriate behavior. Substance abuse can be a gateway to emotional abuse and an unhealthy relationship.”
— Merely Me, 10 Signs You May Be in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Alcohol, Drugs, unhealthy
“An emotional abuser goes through life feeling entitled to be treated like royalty, and wants you to be a willing servant. He or she expects you to do everything and will not help at all.”
— Merely Me, 10 Signs You May Be in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, Expectations, Servant, Entitled
“If you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, there is a good chance that eventually things may get physical. At first, the abuser might pull your hair, push you, or grab you so hard that you bruise; these may only be warning signs that things can escalate further.”
— Merely Me, 10 Signs You May Be in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Tagged: Emotional Abuse, physical, Violence, Warning Signs