All Quotes tagged Sex Stories(127)

I just broke up with a guy I'd been seeing for almost a year, about a month ago. I cannot believe I was with this guy AT ALL, let alone for an entire year. He had poor hygiene (would pick his nose and eat his boogers, almost compulsively. Like, if we were watching a movie, he would be doing it the entire time, until I finally flipped out about 3 months ago), was just generally disgusting (he would fart and then cup it and put it in his own face.

Like almost every time he farted, he would do this, even if everyone was clearly not amused and I would tell him to stop. He even did it in front of my parents the first time I took him to their house. I wanted to die), his morals were garbage (basically, he thought like a 7-year-old, so if someone did something he didn't like, even by accident, he would do something mean and spiteful for revenge), he was absolutely dumber than a bag of hammers, yet showed no interest in actually learning anything (didn't know who our vice president was, what a liberal, Democrat, conservative, or Republican was, thought Europe was a country, assumed all Latinos were Mexican...), he was a total deadbeat to his 16 year old son (he would tell him he was going to be at family events and then refuse to show up and not tell anyone.

He also told me he loved me more than he loved his son, which made me really pissed off. Seriously, what kind of a man are you, dude?), he would use me for my money and resources (would borrow my car and then give it back with an empty tank, or would use my things and then give it back trashed), absolutely HORRIBLE in bed (only went down on me a handful of times and even admitted that it was because he was lazy, even though I went down on him almost every day.

He did not even ask or think about whether or not I got off, until I finally brought it up after like a full month of dating, then would get frustrated, yell, and punch walls or leave the room if he couldn't get me off within 10 minutes). Seriously, this guy sucks so bad. My self-esteem is absolute shit, I don't know what I was thinking.

We had one girl in our high school, she was 13/14 when these two events happened but if you mention her to anybody aged 18-25 they know who she is.

First - She let a dog lick her out on a park bench. It was talked about for months until a girl in my year group videoed herself being fingered on a school laptop and an IT technician found it. Then everyone kind of forgot/treated it as a myth.

Second - Big Christmas party at one of the most popular guys house in my year group. His parents were rich as fuck and lived in the 'posh' part of the town so obviously his house was the best place to have a party because it was huge. He invited so many people that it just ended up being a massive stereotypical American party you see in the movies. Everyone was drunk as fuck. This girl decides she's in love with the guy who hosted the party and wants to get his attention. So she goes to his Christmas tree, shouts 'watch this!', and shoves one of his mum's expensive as fuck Christmas baubles up her vagina.

Silence. The party host just covered his mouth and whispered 'not the fucking Harrods bauble'. Even more silence. Then the bauble broke.

Inside her vagina.

It was the best and worst Christmas party I've ever been to. None of the staff were ever informed what happened (to our knowledge) but the lad who hosted the party had to put up with everyone asking our form tutors if we could take a school trip to Harrods for months.