H Influencer Collective / Alivia Latimer

24 Quotes That Prove Even The Biggest Fuckboy Is Capable Of Change

"All I have to do is remember the expression on my girlfriend’s face the first and only time she caught me cheating..."
Mélanie Berliet
September 9, 2016
“I want to change. I’m totally in love with her and I want to marry her and I want her to be the mother of my children and I want to be the man that I always wanted to be. I never imagined myself cheating on my wife, and I don’t plan on doing that. And I haven’t cheated on her since we’ve gotten engaged. It’s a chance at a fresh start, and I feel like I can live with myself if I change now. If I can stay faithful all the way up until we’re married, I imagine it’ll get easier in time. I hope I don’t get resentful or anything, but so far I haven’t.”
— Anonymous Guy, Confessions of a Serial Cheater (Who's About to Get Married)
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Love, Couples
“It's crucial to figure out why you cheated in the first place in order to prevent it from happening again. For example, after a few weeks of therapy post ex-breakup, it became clear to me that one of my biggest emotional triggers is when someone cancels plans on me at the last minute. So, in my current relationship, I communicated my need for reliability early on. Now, when plans do change, as plans are wont to do, my boyfriend makes it clear that he's not blowing me off. I am better able to reassure myself that he loves me, and the world spins madly on.”
— Rebecca Santiago, 3 Tips For Former Cheaters Who Want To Stay Faithful (Or, How Not To Cheat For Dummies)
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Relationships, Love
“Thinking back on the way I treated women as a young adult, I can’t believe I ever got laid. But I did. A lot. Then at 28, I got laid off from my job as an advertising exec. Walking home midday, in the depressingly empty streets, I realized that I had nothing. Sure, I had a few thousand dollars saved up, but I had no one to go home to. No one to vent to. No one to hold. I was alone, and it was my fault because I’d been such a dick for so long. I pledged to change my ways that day, and I did. If you don’t want to end up alone, you have to treat people the way they deserve.”
— Anonymous Guy, 10 Reformed Playboys Reveal What Finally Made Them Start Respecting Women
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Love, Sex, Couples
“A few years ago I was dating lots of women simultaneously, ditching anyone who demanded ‘girlfriend status’ and literally picking their replacement on Tinder the next day. I actually logged girls into my phone with notes about what they looked like because it got too hard to remember who was who. One night I gave my regular ‘thanks but no thanks’ bullshit spiel to yet another woman who demanded exclusivity after a month, and she stared back at me and said, ‘Unacceptable.’ She took a stand and I was so impressed by that. I knew right then she was worth changing for.”
— Anonymous Guy, 12 Former Players Reveal Exactly How Their Girlfriends Officially Won Them Over
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Love, Couples
“One day a few months back my little sister came home from school balling. I asked her what was up and she said this guy she’d been crushing on who’d been flirting with her non-stop suddenly stopped Snapping her back and refused to acknowledge her in the hallway—like it was nbd. I wanted to kill the bastard, but I also had to admit to myself that I’d done the same thing dozens of times over. My sister’s the reason I don’t do that shit anymore.”
— Anonymous Guy, 12 Former ‘Ghosters’ On That One Special Girl Who Made Them Change Their Ways
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Relationships, Love, Sex
“My inner fuckboy took a one-way trip to another universe exactly 123 days ago, when I decided to stop being a dick because I met a girl who deserves the best. She's the love of my life, and I plan on giving her my personal best for the long haul.”
— Anonymous Guy, 13 Former Fuckboys Reveal How One Special Girl Changed Them For Good
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Love, Sex, Relationships
“You see the question is not "Can I ever trust him again"? but rather, "What contributed to this person's choice to betray me - why did they choose infidelity"? The first question is an unanswerable one as trusting your partner following an affair has more to do with YOU and how YOU choose to respond to being betrayed. The second question is much more interesting, and if answered correctly, more likely to keep you safe if you decide to heal and evolve together following an affair.”
— Jay Kent-Ferraro, Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater... Maybe Not
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Relationships, Sex, Love
“If the person you are interested in has made mistakes in past relationships and admits to them, and also acknowledges that these poor choices hurt the people he or she cared about, then that is a good beginning. Assuming that you believe that this person is sincere, this acceptance of responsibility demonstrates a certain amount of self-awareness and is also evidence of a working ethical system.”
— eHarmony, Should You Date a Former Cheater?
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Sex, Love, Couples
“You used to be a cheater. You’re not one now. Here’s the rule: Once you cheat, you MUST know why it happened so that it will NEVER happen again. You didn’t cheat because you’re a horrible person. You cheated because you couldn’t deal with horrible feelings. Cheating is just a symptom of something deeper — fears, insecurities, trust issues, shameful secrets, childhood trauma, etc.. Once you know exactly why you cheated, when your partner asks you about your cheating past, you can explain, ‘Yes, I cheated. I was young, immature, and insecure. I had little self-esteem and was too scared to face the truth. Through the years, I’ve worked to be a better version of me. I love myself now. I understand why I did it and I would never do it again.”
— Harlan Cohen, Once a cheater NOT always a cheater
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Relationships, Love, Sex
“You don't have to be a jerk to be adulterous — a lot people cheat purely because they aren’t happy in the relationship. Not everyone can have the mature ‘I don’t think this is working out’ talk. Some people take another way out.

Because nothing says ‘I'm not satisfied in my relationship’ like banging someone on your bed while you're at work.”
— Brian Whitney, Why Do People Cheat? 11 Reasons A Partner Might Be Unfaithful, According To A Former Cheater
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Relationships, Sex, Love
“Change requires developing a new set of beliefs and a whole new philosophy. Developing ones mindset. That was the journey that I embarked upon. Becoming the best me that I could be did not include lying, stealing, or cheating.

Not being a cheater is simply a byproduct of being the person that I have decided to become. I no longer hang out with people who cheat. I don’t gather in places or with people where cheating is acceptable, because that goes against the person that I have worked so hard in becoming.”
— Cliff Townsend, Why I Cheated on All the Women I Loved
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Love, Sex, Relationships
“It’s not that I’m that good of a guy, but I hate discomfort and there’s nothing more awkward than having to face your girlfriend one-on-one after feeling some other chick up or crossing some kind of boundary, however far you go. Believe, I know—but I’m a changed guy now. I don’t cheat because I know myself and I wouldn’t be able to stand the consequences.”
— Anonymous Guy, 12 Guys On How To Stay Faithful, Even In The Face Of Serious Temptation
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Sex, Love, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Couples
“All I have to do is remember the expression on my girlfriend’s face the first and only time she caught me cheating. She was so fucking crushed, it killed me. And then she managed to forgive me. I don’t want to do that to her ever again. She deserves so much better.”
— Anonymous Guy, 14 Men Reveal How They Resist Even The Slightest Urge To Cheat On Their Girlfriends
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Relationships, Love, Sex, Couples
“I’ll never do it again. But it’s not like I’ve had some ethical reawakening. All that sneaking around will drive a man crazy after a while. Even if you’re in a bad place in your marriage, the deceit will weigh on you and it’s just not worth it in the end. My exploits will probably send me to the grave a decade earlier than scheduled. And for what? Some cheap thrills and a bunch of mediocre blowjobs.”
— Anonymous Guy, 15 Married Men Who Cheated Reveal What It’s Like To Have An Affair
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Love, Sex, Relationships, how to stay faithful, Couples
“If he’s committed to making this work, then I’m going to trust that he knows better than to be reckless with this relationship again. It’s about rebuilding trust, too. I made the choice to trust that he can change and give him another shot.”
— Savannah Hemmings, True Story: He Cheated, I Stayed
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Couples, Love, Sex, Relationships
“Ultimately, it wasn't the kids who kept us together; it was that there was still love in the relationship—and there was a sense of deeply knowing him. I knew, in my core, that this was a mistake, not a personality flaw. And the fact that he was clearly in pain and willing to do whatever it took gave me a strange kind of hope. Eventually I decided I wanted to work through it, too. If that had been one-sided, we'd never be where we are now.”
— Naomi Chrisoulakis, My Husband Cheated On Me—And I Stayed With Him
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Love, Sex, Couples, Relationships
“Deciding if you can trust your boyfriend after he betrayed you is one of the most difficult – and perhaps one of the most important – decisions you’ll ever make. Nobody can tell you if he’ll never cheat on you again. You need to listen to the still small voice inside you, and take a leap of faith.”
— Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen, 5 Good Signs You Can Trust Your Boyfriend After He Cheated
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Love, Sex, Relationships, how to stay faithful, Couples
“In the end, taking a cheating spouse back is a difficult decision to make. But in some cases, surprisingly, doing so can completely change the relationship for the better.”
— Opal Stacie, It Happened To Me: Taking Him Back After He Cheated
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Love, Sex, Relationships, how to stay faithful, Couples
“Whether we like to admit it or not, getting drunk and hooking up with strangers is a pretty big part of what our generation likes to do on the weekends. In no way does that make cheating okay, but it does make it easier to forgive. How harshly can we really judge a twenty-year old guy who has only ever been with one person his entire life for kissing a pretty girl while he was drunk at a party?

It was fairly easy to forgive my boyfriend for what he did. One mistake couldn’t change how I felt about him. Putting myself in his shoes, I could understand and only hoped he would have shown me the same sympathy had it been the other way around. Making the decision to stay and work it out was a no brainer. The difficult part came when the actual working out started.”
— Jessica Pena, Dealing With Infidelity: It's Okay To Stay After He Cheats
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Love, Sex, Couples, Relationships
“We had the benefit of a fabulous counselor who helped us work through the fallout of infidelity. Who taught my husband how to just be with me in my pain and accept responsibility without flinching. She showed us how to rebuild a marriage based on honesty and transparency. She made it clear that no marriage is immune to infidelity. And that marriage is more than sexual fidelity. That’s a part of it, of course. But it’s much more.

So here we are, seven years since my world imploded. And though I’ll never say my husband’s affair was good for us, I will say that we’ve grown in ways we couldn’t have imagined. I have found a joy I thought impossible. He is happier and more whole than he’s ever been.”
— Anonymous Woman, True Story: My Husband Cheated. I Stayed & We Worked Through It
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Love, Sex, Couples, Relationships, how to stay faithful
“After the revelation of an affair, some couples have the most passionate sex they’ve ever had. That’s a big, unspoken truth. There’s something about the fear of loss that triggers desire and a depth of conversation that helps some people access a new level of honesty.”
— Esther Perel, 10 Ways To Get Over An Affair
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, how to stay faithful, Affairs, Love, Sex, Relationships
“All marriages are alike to the degree that confronting an affair forces the couple to reevaluate their relationship, but dissimilar in how the couple lives with the legacy of that affair. I already knew the marriages I was tracing in these follow-up interviews had survived; now I wanted to assess the quality of that survival. What were the useful shock absorbers that sustained the couple? Did they think that therapy had helped?

Specificities notwithstanding, I identified three basic patterns in the way couples reorganize themselves after an infidelity—they never really get past the affair, they pull themselves up by the bootstraps and let it go, or they leave it far behind.”
— Esther Perel, After The Storm: The Affair In Retrospect
Tagged: Cheating, Affairs, Love, Sex, relationsihps, Couples, how to stay faithful, Infidelity
“We don’t know the exact numbers because people lie about sex and 10 times more about adultery. But the vast majority of people we come into contact with in our offices are content in their marriages. They are longtime monogamists who one day cross a line into a place they never thought they would go. They remain monogamous in their beliefs, but they experience a chasm between their behavior and their beliefs.”
— Esther Perel, Why We Cheat: Spouses in happy marriages have affairs. What are we all looking for?
Tagged: Cheating, Love, Sex, Relationships, Affairs, Infidelity, Couples, how to stay faithful
“It would be foolish not to take the circumstances into consideration. Was the person who cheated on you someone with whom you were in a long-term relationship and the cheating was a one-night stand under the influence of alcohol? That would be much different than if it was someone you'd only just started dating and the cheating occurred multiple times. Is the person who cheated apologetic? What are the risks of catching an STD?

There are times when you should never give a cheater a second chance, but there also are exceptions. So I can't give you any hard and fast rules, but if you're really confused about a situation, then you should consult a counselor.”
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer, Is it sensible to take back a cheater?
Tagged: Cheating, Infidelity, Relationships, Sex, Love, Affairs, how to stay faithful, Couples