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Charlie Day Quotes

Total quotes: 46
“I'll just regress, because I feel I've made myself perfectly redundant.”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: Paddy's Pub
Tagged: Regress, Redundant, Nonsense
“Dee: I am not a failure!

Mac: Dennis, what is it that you call it when somebody tries to do something but doesn't succeed?

Dennis: Uh, that would in fact be a failure.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 2: Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass
Tagged: Failure, Fail, Sassy, Diss
“No no no, that's not gonna help. That's not gonna help and I'll tell you why: It doesn't unbang your Mom.”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 2: Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom
Tagged: Sex, Mom, Advice
“And I don't think you should do just what makes you happy. I think you should do what makes you great.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Happiness, Improvement
“Charlie: Do wasps make honey?

Dennis: No wasps do not make honey.

Charlie: Alright well I'm gonna check it out anyway, there could be something delicious in here that wasps do make and I want that”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The Waitress Is Getting Married
Tagged: Wasp, Bees, Honey, Exploring, Questions
“I eat stickers all the time dude!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The Gang Hits the Road
Tagged: Stickers, Gross, food
“ I hate listening to people's dreams. It is like flipping through a stack of photographs. If I'm not in any of them and nobody is having sex, I just don't care.”
— Dennis Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 1: The Gang Gets Racist
Tagged: Dreams, Selfish, Sex, Indifferent, Listening
“I'm not asking you to do anything, just turn a blind eye while I rob this place stupid.”
— Deandra Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: The Gang Sells Out
Tagged: Robbing, blind eye
“Dee: Maybe you shouldn't have your window open!

Mac: maybe you shouldn't be throwing jars of piss out the window!”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The Gang Hits the Road
Tagged: window, Piss, Gross, angry
“Frank: There is nothing more threatening to a man than a woman who is smart and attractive. We have to pretend you're both!

Dee: Wow, That's my dad everyone!”
— Frank Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 2: The Gang Runs for Office
Tagged: Smart, Attractive, Women, Men, Rude
“Dude, it's amazing. Look at this. Bro, you could chop a camel right in the hump and drink all of its milk right off the tip of this thing.”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: The Gang Finds A Dumpster Baby
Tagged: milk, Drink, Amazing, surprise
“Cannibalism? Racism? Dude, that's not for us...those decisions are better left to the suits in Washington. We're just here to eat some dude!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: Mac and Dennis
Tagged: Cannibalism, food, Politics, Decisions
“Dennis: Lay it on us, bud.

Mac: It involves us pulling up our bootstraps, oiling up a couple of asses, and doing a little plowing of our own. Not gay sex.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis
Tagged: gay, Sex, Euphomism, Hard Work
“ Keep singing, bitch! You're not gonna have a face by the time I'm through with you!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Nightman Cometh
Tagged: Singing, Anger, Threat, Mad, insults
“Dee: Are you actually gonna throw away all your convictions for a chance to get laid?

Dennis: I don't really have any convictions.”
— Dennis Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 1: Charlie Wants an Abortion
Tagged: Convictions, Sex, Laid
“You wanna talk about stress? You wanna talk about stress?! Okay! I've stumbled onto a major company conspiracy, Mac--how 'bout that for stress?”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: Sweet Dee Has a Heart Attack
Tagged: Stress, company, Conspiracy, Stressed Out
“So the Wendy's manager was like 'You gotta clean dat up!' and I was like they're your hamburgers you clean them up. Artemis was all bummed out about something I did to myself with the onions and now she won't talk to me.”
— Frank Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The Waitress Is Getting Married
Tagged: Clean Up, Gross, Onions, upset
“Frank: Anyone want any more catfish?

Charlie: Yo dude. Definitely give me another one of those. They're delicious. And you can taste that sort of endangered tang...”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: The Gang Buys a Boat
Tagged: Endangered, food, Catfish
“Mac: Hey bro, how'd you lose your hand?

Sailor: Diabetes.

Mac: That's not much of an adventure is it? Kind of tragic.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: The Gang Buys a Boat
Tagged: Diabetes, hand, tragic, Adventure
“Just so I'm clear, you don't actually think things are going to come alive because you're spending the night in museum, right?”
— Deandra Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: Who Got Dee Pregnant
Tagged: Night At Museum, alive, Movie
“As best we know, we have one life. In it you have to trust your own voice, your own ideas, your own honesty, your vulnerability and through this you will find your way.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Success, Failure
“Dee: Those goddam North Koreans.

Dennis: They are some sneaky bastards.”
— Dennis Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation
Tagged: Sneaky
“You cannot let fear of failure or fear of comparison or fear of judgement, stop you from doing what's going to make you great.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Video
Tagged: Commencement Speech, Motivational Speech
“Do what makes you uncomfortable and scary and hard, but it will pay off in the long run.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Scared, Fear, Hard Work
“Be willing to fail. Let yourself fail. Fail in the way in the place where you would want to fail.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Failing, Success, motivation
“Live like this the best you can. And I guarantee you will look back at a life well lived.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Best Life, motivation, Goals
“Oh my God! I will...I will smash your face into- into a jelly!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 1: Charlie Wants an Abortion
Tagged: Anger, Violence, Frustration, jelly
“I'm cracking eggs of wisdom!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 1: Charlie Has Cancer
Tagged: eggs, Wisdom, Problem Solving
“Masturbating Bums are bad for Business.”
— Frank Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: Bums
Tagged: Bums, masturbation, Business
“Glue is for huffing, dude!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person
Tagged: Glue, Huffing
“I am going to smack everyone into tiny...little...pieces!”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Nightman Cometh
Tagged: Anger, Frustration, Smack, annoyed
“Charlie: Okay, okay. First of all, there are people out there who actually have been molested and you guys are going to exploit that for your own personal gain? You jackholes are securing your places in hell.

Ryan: We've thought about it. We're willing to roll the dice.”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 1: Charlie Got Molested
Tagged: Molested, Hell, Chance, Personal Gain
“You know what dude, hear me out for a second okay. Now technically, that stain did appear to me. Also I am familiar with carpentry and I don't know who my father is. So, am I the messiah? I don't know, I could be, I'm not ruling it out”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 2: The Gang Exploits A Miracle
Tagged: jesus, father, Messiah, Questioning
“The acid's makin' me feel like I gotta take a dump.”
— Frank Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: The Gang Gets Invincible
Tagged: Drugs, Poop, Acid
“Mac, I'm gonna stop you right there. First of all, your breath smells like an old-lady fart passing through an onion. Secondly, I know you're trying to manipulate me. And it's not going to work. Get your hand off my shoulder because I've got a fatty to burn.”
— Deandra Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: The Aluminum Monster vs. Fatty Magoo
Tagged: Sassy, manipulation, Smell, Diss
“ I don't wanna see you or your dirty balls in my alley again!”
— Deandra Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 3: Bums
Tagged: balls, Bums, dirt, Yelling, mean
“But my lesson is I don't give a shit.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: It's Always Sunny, Commencement Speeches, Motivational
“You cannot succeed without risk of failure.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Video
Tagged: Motivational Speeches, Success
“Without this struggle what is your success anyway.”
— Charlie Day, Motivational Videos
Tagged: Struggle, Success, Failing
“Frank: You gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boy's hole. You gotta pay the troll toll to get in. You want this baby boy's hole, you gotta pay the troll toll.

Charlie: Stop, stop, stop. All right not bad, good rhythm, love the enthusiasm. I feel like you're saying 'boy's hole', and it's clearly 'soul.'”
— Charlie Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Nightman Cometh
Tagged: Mistakes, Troll, Hole, Musical
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