Close ×

TV Quotes / Seinfeld /

The Mohel Quotes

Total quotes (4)

The Mohel

The Mohel

Character

Portrayed by Charles Levin

Trending Shows

Total quotes (4)

One more peep out of you and I'll slice you up like a smoked sturgeon.

— The Mohel (Charles Levin), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Bris

Threats Sturgeon

Share

Is the baby gonna cry like that? Is that how the baby cries, with the loud, sustained, squealing cry, 'cause that could pose a problem. Do you have any control of your child 'cause this is the time to exercise it when baby is crying in that high-pitched, squealing tone that can drive you insane?

— The Mohel (Charles Levin), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Bris

Circumcision Mohel Judaism

Share

Did I find it all right? I mean could you send me to a more dangerous neighborhood? I'm dreading walking back to the subway, someone shouldn't crack me over the head and steal my bag, 'accuse I'll be lying there on the street in this neighborhood and people will spit on me and empty my pockets. I'll lie in the gutter like a bum, like a dog, like a mutt, like an animal! God forbid someone should help me or call an ambulance. No, that's too much trouble to pick up a phone and press a few buttons.

— The Mohel (Charles Levin), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Bris

Ghettos Slums danger Bad Neighborhoods Robbery

Share

Darling, you see where that glass is? How that glass is near the edge of the table. You got the whole table there to put the glass, why you chose the absolute edge, so half the glass is hanging off the table, you breathe and that glass falls over, then you're gonna have broken glass on the carpet, embedded in the carpet fibers, deep, deep in the shag, broken glass, bits of broken glass that you never get out. You can't get it out with a vacuum cleaner. Even on your hands and knees with a magnifying glass, you can't get all the pieces, and then you think you got it all and two years later, you're walkin' barefoot and you step on a piece of broken glass and you kill yourself, is that what you want?

— The Mohel (Charles Levin), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Bris

Mohel Circumcision High-strung

Share

Related quotes to The Mohel tagged Threats

Most people see the world as a threatening place, and, because they do, the world turns out, indeed, to be a threatening place.

— Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Threats Perception Optimism Pessimism

Share

In extreme cases, a spouse, close friend or family member may threaten suicide if they deem that it will get them care or attention or enable them to have their way.

— Joseph Mattera, 12 Signs Someone Is Manipulating and Controlling You

manipulation Threats Suicide

Share

Because I'm like ice, buddy. When I don't like you, you've got problems.

— Cosmo Kramer (Michael Richards), Seinfeld, Season 3: The Parking Space

Threats Coldness

Share

All right, all right. All right you go ahead. You go ahead and keep it secret. But you remember this. When you control the mail, you control...information.

— Newman (Wayne Knight), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Lip Reader

Mail USPS Mailmen Threats

Share

Jimmy’s gonna get you, Kramer! Hands off Jimmy! Don’t touch Jimmy! Let go of Jimmy!

— Jimmy (Anthony Starke), Seinfeld, Season 6: The Jimmy

Self-Referential Third Person Threats

Share

Bela: You make me an offer and I think you'll find me highly cooperative.

Gordon: OK, how about you tell me where they are, or I kill you right now?

— Gordon Walker (Sterling K. Brown), Supernatural, Season 3: Fresh Blood

Threats Compromise

Share

The angel blade won't work. Because I'm not an angel anymore. I'm your new God. A better one. So you will bow down and profess your love unto me, your Lord, or I shall destroy you.

— Eric Kripke, Supernatural, Season 6: The Man Who Knew Too Much

God Angels Submission Lord Threats

Share

The army is ready...to wipe out the Egyptian army. A generation will pass before Egypt threatens us again.

— Ariel Sharon, In quotes: Ariel Sharon

Six-Day War War Threats

Share

Don't look at me. If you look at me again, I'll shoot you.

— Richard Ramirez, via web.archive.org

Threats Don't Look At Me

Share

Manipulators often try to intimidate others with aggressive language, subtle threats, or outright anger. Especially if they see you’re uncomfortable with confrontation, they will use it to quickly control you and get their way.

— Barrie Davenport, Emotional Manipulation

manipulation Intimidation Threats Anger

Share

If you are clever enough to bring destruction upon me, rest assured that I shall do as much to you.

— Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Memoirs Of Sherlock Holmes

clever Destruction Threats

Share

It was always people--that was the problem. I can't believe i'm saying this but the dead... They're a manageable threat.

— Robert Kirkman, The Walking Dead Collection: Rise of the Governor, The Road to Woodbury, The fall of the Governor, Part I, The Fall of the Governor, Part II, Just Another Day at the Office (The Walking Dead Series)

zombies humanity Threats

Share

You and Dad are a lot more alike than I thought, you know that? You both can't wait to sacrifice yourself for this thing, but you know what? I'm gonna be the one to bury you

— Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles), Supernatural, Season 1: Devil's Trap

Threats Sacrifice

Share

You know what I'm gonna do to your sibling? I'm gonna stand over their crib and I'm gonna bleed into their mouth. Demon blood is better than Ovaltine. Vitamins, minerals...it makes you big and strong!

— Azazel (Christopher MacCabe), Supernatural, Season 4: In the Beginning

Threats Demon Blood Child Abuse

Share

Louise: Speaking of Christmas, here is my annual list of demands.

Bob: ‘My own apartment.’

Louise: And it cannot be a studio. You have exactly seven shopping days to comply. If it rolls into day eight, there will be tears and violence.

— Louise Belcher (Kristen Schaal), Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Bob Rest Ye Merry Gentle-Mannequins

List of Demands Christmas List Studio Apartment Threats Tears Violence

Share

Every time I go into the kitchen I'm in a boxing ring. I'm walking out, they are getting carried out.

— Gordon Ramsay, Gordon Ramsay: the F Factor

kitchen Boxing Ring Threats

Share

Not real? But what about me? My dreams? My thoughts? My body? Are they not real? And what if I took these unreal fingers and used them to decorate the walls with your outsized personality? Would that be real?

— Maeve Millay (Thandie Newton), Westworld, Season 2: Episode 1

Share

Did you hear that naked ass appeal to racial solidarity? I'd like to kick his pale entitled ass.

— Norman Wilson (Reg E. Cathey), The Wire, Season 4: Corner Boys

Racial Solidarity Threats anti-white racism Entitled Pale

Share

There's no saving Clay. He's like a wounded animal. But the next dead body you're gonna be standing over is the mother of your grandchild. Are you ready for that?

— Wayne Unser (Dayton Callie), Sons of Anarchy, Season 4: Kiss

Share

These next few months will be the most excruciatingly painful time of your sick and miserable life.

— Lee Toric (Donal Logue), Sons of Anarchy, Season 5: To Thine Own Self

Threats Sadism Pain Misery

Share

You know the biggest difference between me and Mr. Pope? Damon made his bones being the smartest guy on the street. I made mine being the deadliest. Don't cross me, Jackson. I have no remorse killing you or any of the Sons.

— August Marks (Billy Brown), Sons of Anarchy, Season 7: Playing with Monsters

street smarts Violence Remorse Threats

Share

I am the one who knocks!

— Walter White (Bryan Cranston), Breaking Bad, Season 4: Cornered

Threats knock knock

Share

Of course you realize this means war!

— Bugs Bunny (Mel Blanc), Elmer's Pet Rabbit

Share

I can either cut your throat or I can strangle you. I don't believe in guns.

— Dr. Oliver Thredson (Zachary Quinto), American Horror Story, Asylum: Dark Cousin

Threats Death Threats Gun Control

Share

You know I care about you. I think you're making the right choice. Your natural lifespan is going to be richer and fuller than you can imagine. And someday, when you die, I'll be the one that puts you on the ground.

— Marceline the Vampire Queen (Olivia Olson), Adventure Time, Season 7: Marceline The Vampire Queen (1)

Share

Our efforts will fail in Afghanistan and Pakistan if we don't invest in their future.

— Barack Obama, Remarks by the President on a New Strategy for Afghanistan and Pakistan, March 27, 2009

Obama: First Term 2009-2012 Terrorism Politics America Threats goal Defeat Safety

Share

I don’t make threats. Only promises.

— Aelin Galathynius, Queen of Shadows (Throne of Glass)

Words Threats promises

Share

We will not bend or fail until the blood of every last Jew from the youngest child to the oldest elder is spilt to redeem our land!

— Yasser Arafat, via en.wikiquote.org

Jews Threats Blood

Share

Don't talk back to me. Didn't you hear what I say? Get out! You want me to call the cops? I make and break little worms like you every day. Do you know how much money I make? Do you have any idea? Do you know where I live? I can have any woman in this city that I want. Any one. Now, GET OUT!

— Russell Dalrymple (Bob Balaban), Seinfeld, Season 4: The Pilot (Part 2)

Threats Arrogance Employers Anger

Share

I can't take this anymore! I don't want to hear how interesting the change with the hole in it is! And if you tell me what time it is in New York again, you are going home in a body bag!

— Elaine Benes (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), Seinfeld, Season 9: The Butter Shave

Foreign Currency travel Annoyance Threats

Share

When you control the mail, you control...information.

— Newman (Wayne Knight), Seinfeld, Season 5: The Lip Reader

Postal Service Mail information Threats Going Postal Megalomaniac Mailman Data Science

Share

Don't mistake the fact that we haven't set you on fire in your sleep for trust.

— Damon Salvatore (Ian Somerhalder), The Vampire Diaries, Season 2: Know Thy Enemy

Share

I can kill you with my brain.

— River Tam (Summer Glau), Firefly, Season 1: Trash

Threats Telepathy

Share

[cornering a drug dealer] The cheese stands alone.

— Omar Little (Michael Kenneth Williams), The Wire, Season 1: The Pager

Share

Now you make sure you tell old Marlo I burned the money. 'Cause it ain't about that paper. It's about me hurtin' his people and messin' with his world. Tell that boy he ain't man enough to come down to the street with Omar. You tell him that!

— Omar Little (Michael Kenneth Williams), The Wire, Season 5: The Dickensian Aspect

Share

After I finish you, I'm gonna find that little bastard son of yours. And I'm gonna show him both of his dead parents! And I'm gonna tell him it was all your fault!

— The Reaper (C. Thomas Howell), Criminal Minds, Season 5: 100

Threats Sadism Bastard

Share

Dean: I said I wish I had a baseball. You know, like Steve McQueen.

Lucas: Yeah? Well, I wish I had a bat. So I bash your freaking head in.

Dean: Okay. So much for the bonding in solitary moment.

— Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles), Supernatural, Season 2: Folsom Prison Blues

Steve McQueen baseball Threats Bonding

Share

I wanna take her stupid neck and wring it!

— Linda Belcher (John Roberts), Bob's Burgers, Season 5: Late Afternoon in the Garden of Bob and Louise

Threats Strangulation Wanting To Kill People Desire to Murder

Share

Are you calling me irrational? Because I'll tear your head off, Daniel. I'll tear it off, and I'll throw it over that fence.

— Kim Kelly (Busy Philipps), Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: The Diary

irrational Violence Irony Threats

Share

Threatening to commit suicide if you leave.

— Marni Feuerman, 21 Warning Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship | World of Psychology

Emotional Abuse Threats Suicide

Share

He reminds you that he has options. He wants you to feel like the lucky one in the relationship. He could have any woman he wants and he chose you. Wow, aren’t you special? Instead of building you up, he tears you down with the reminder that you could easily be replaced.

— Kelsey Dykstra, 10 Scary Signs He’s Manipulating You

manipulation Options Threats Replaceable

Share

If you're setting me up in any way, I will rip your heart out and shove it down your throat. Something I'm very good at.

— Damon Salvatore (Ian Somerhalder), The Vampire Diaries, Season 2: Katerina

Share

You so much as flash a pretty grin at him—I will jam my fist so far up your bony ass, your cup size will double.

— Gemma Teller Morrow (Katey Sagal), Sons of Anarchy, Season 1: AK 51

Threats Fisting

Share

How would you like it if I just pulled your heart out of your chest right now and shoved it down your throat?

— Tom Pepper (Larry Hankin), Seinfeld, Season 4: The Pilot (Part 2)

Share

Oh, we all get a little cuckoo sometimes, George. I used to be like you. Rating personnel ’tll they cried, calling managers on the field during a game, threatening to move the team to New Jersey, just to upset people. Then I found a way to relax. I've got two words to say to you, George: hot tub.

— George Steinbrenner (Larry David), Seinfeld, Season 7: The Hot Tub

Hot Tubs Jacuzzis New Jersey Threats Relaxation

Share

Trust me, Kramer. Given the legal opportunity, I will kill you.

— Jerry Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld), Seinfeld, Season 8: The Comeback

Share

Trending Shows