Paul Fusco Quotes

Total quotes (21)

Paul Fusco

Paul Fusco

Character

AKA Paul Fusco

Birthday January 29, 1953

Birthplace New Haven, Connecticut, United States

Nationality United States Of America

Occupations Television Actor, Film Actor, Voice Actor, Puppeteer, Actor

Characters Portrayed

ALF (voice)

Total quotes (21)

Let's go to dinner. Don't worry—tab's on me. Though I'm not paying for Brian's invisible friend.

— Uncle Albert (Elisha Cook Jr), ALF, Season 2: We're So Sorry, Uncle Albert

Dinner pick up the tab

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Why are you so intent on moving out of a house that you like, in order for you to continue to do a job you don't like?

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: Movin' Out

Bad decisions House Job

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ALF: Why don't you ring up Ann-Margret and get her over here?

Aaron King: Sure... I'll just head on over to Graceland and pick up my Rolodex.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds

Ann-Margret Rolodex Graceland

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[looks through a Viewmaster] Oh, yeah, Sylvester and Tweety! [flips a lever] Yeah! Die, cat, die!

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Oh, Tannerbaum

Sylvester Tweety Bird cat hate

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ALF: Ignorance is no excuse.

Kate Tanner: Ignorance is your excuse all the time!

ALF: I don't know what you are talking about.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: You Ain't Nothin' But a Hound Dog

Ignorance feigning ignorance

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Aaron King: What do you aliens do all day? Look for dead celebrities?

ALF: I'm so tired of that stereotype.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds

Aliens dead celebrities stereotypes

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Kate Tanner: Has anyone seen my yellow ribbon?

ALF: I don't know, what color is it? Ha! I kill me.

Brian Tanner: Ha! You kill me.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Strangers in the Night

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Where do you keep your casserole dishes? The cat wont fit in the toaster.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: On the Road Again

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There are many things in this universe you're not meant to understand. Now, that doesn't mean they're not real. I'm real, and whether other people believe you or not, you know I'm real.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: Take a Look at Me Now

amusing real Unreal

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Aaron King: Can I pet you?

ALF: Only above the waist.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds

petting Sexual Harassment

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Either he's Elvis, or Priscilla had a heck of a lawn sale.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds

Elvis Presley priscilla presley yard sale

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Oh heck, why must I be so darn curious?

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Lookin' Through the Windows

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Why must you needlessly complicate everything?

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: Night Train

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Aren't you guys happy? You are here on Gilligan’s island?

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: Somewhere Over the Rerun

Gilligan's Island

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Kate Tanner: [after ALF claims that according to a magazine article, he is a thrill-seeker] This from the same person who watched the movie Aliens from under the couch?

ALF: Hey, I thought I owed one of those guys money.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 2: Night Train

thrill-seeker Mob

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Willie: I was going down Fifth Street Road, and instead of taking a left I took a right...

ALF: I thought you couldn't turn right down that road, it's a one-way street.

Willie: ALF, what difference does it make to you?

ALF: What difference does it make? HAH! I'm not driving with you anymore!

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Border Song

Driving Directions

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[ALF is discovered under Willie and Kate's bed]
Kate: ALF, what are you doing down there?

ALF: Trying to keep warm! The garage is FREEZING! I've been down here the last couple of nights!

Willie: [uneasy] Were you here, Sunday night?

ALF: [winks] Don't worry, I was sound asleep. Didn't hear a THING.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Mother and Child Reunion

Hiding didn't hear a thing

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ALF: Um, excuse me, sir. Can I have a word with you?

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: Who said that?

ALF: I did. Could you take some constructive criticism? What you're doing here is wrong.

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: [Looks at ALF with a flashlight] Heh heh. Must be one of them talking dolls.

ALF: Oh yeah? Ever had a talking doll rip out your voice box?

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: HUH? AAAUGH! [jumps out the bedroom window, scared]

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Strangers in the Night

Burglar Intimidation

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Willie: What are you playing?

ALF: [at a video game] Space Invaders.

Willie: What do they do? Live in your garage, eat all your food, dig up your back yard?

ALF: You're in a mood...

Willie: Yes, I am! Because I found my good hoe, in THIS condition!

[holds up a pole with a bit of mangled scrap iron on one end]

ALF: Oh, yeah. Sorry. I was plowing up your yard and I hit a water main... Don't worry, it wasn't yours.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 1: Border Song

Video Games space invaders

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Willie Tanner: ALF!

Flakey Pete: [walks into the kitchen] Oh. Hi Willie.

Willie Tanner: Where is he?

Flakey Pete: Who? Your little alien guy?

Willie Tanner: If anything... anything has happened to him, you're gonna be...

ALF: Hey. Willie.

Willie Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Willie Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Brian Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Lynn Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Kate Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie?

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Turkey in the Straw (2)

greetings Mistaken Identity

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ALF: ELVIS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!

Willie Tanner: That was not Elvis Presley.

ALF: Are you kidding?, he was on that sandwich like red beans on rice.

Lynn Tanner: He didn't seem like Elvis to me either.

ALF: Elvis was a brilliant actor. He could play anything from a singing race car driver to a singing deep sea diver.

— ALF (voice) (Paul Fusco), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds

Elvis Elvis Presley Elvis Has Left The Building

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