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Paul Fusco Quotes

Total quotes: 21
“Let's go to dinner. Don't worry—tab's on me. Though I'm not paying for Brian's invisible friend.”
— Uncle Albert, ALF, Season 2: We're So Sorry, Uncle Albert
Tagged: Dinner, pick up the tab
“Why are you so intent on moving out of a house that you like, in order for you to continue to do a job you don't like?”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: Movin' Out
Tagged: Bad decisions, House, Job
“ALF: Why don't you ring up Ann-Margret and get her over here?

Aaron King: Sure... I'll just head on over to Graceland and pick up my Rolodex.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds
Tagged: Ann-Margret, Rolodex, Graceland
“Kate Tanner: Has anyone seen my yellow ribbon?

ALF: I don't know, what color is it? Ha! I kill me.

Brian Tanner: Ha! You kill me.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Strangers in the Night
Tagged: You Kill Me
“[looks through a Viewmaster] Oh, yeah, Sylvester and Tweety! [flips a lever] Yeah! Die, cat, die!”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Oh, Tannerbaum
Tagged: Sylvester, Tweety Bird, cat hate
“ALF: Ignorance is no excuse.

Kate Tanner: Ignorance is your excuse all the time!

ALF: I don't know what you are talking about.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: You Ain't Nothin' But a Hound Dog
Tagged: Ignorance, feigning ignorance
“Aaron King: What do you aliens do all day? Look for dead celebrities?

ALF: I'm so tired of that stereotype.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds
Tagged: Aliens, dead celebrities, stereotypes
“Where do you keep your casserole dishes? The cat wont fit in the toaster.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: On the Road Again
Tagged: cat hate
“There are many things in this universe you're not meant to understand. Now, that doesn't mean they're not real. I'm real, and whether other people believe you or not, you know I'm real.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: Take a Look at Me Now
Tagged: amusing, real, Unreal
“Aaron King: Can I pet you?

ALF: Only above the waist.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds
Tagged: petting, Sexual Harassment
“Either he's Elvis, or Priscilla had a heck of a lawn sale.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds
Tagged: Elvis Presley, priscilla presley, yard sale
“Oh heck, why must I be so darn curious?”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Lookin' Through the Windows
Tagged: curious
“Why must you needlessly complicate everything?”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: Night Train
Tagged: Complication
“Aren't you guys happy? You are here on Gilligan’s island?”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: Somewhere Over the Rerun
Tagged: Gilligan's Island
“Kate Tanner: [after ALF claims that according to a magazine article, he is a thrill-seeker] This from the same person who watched the movie Aliens from under the couch?

ALF: Hey, I thought I owed one of those guys money.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 2: Night Train
Tagged: thrill-seeker, Mob
“Willie: I was going down Fifth Street Road, and instead of taking a left I took a right...

ALF: I thought you couldn't turn right down that road, it's a one-way street.

Willie: ALF, what difference does it make to you?

ALF: What difference does it make? HAH! I'm not driving with you anymore!”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Border Song
Tagged: Driving, Directions
“[ALF is discovered under Willie and Kate's bed]
Kate: ALF, what are you doing down there?

ALF: Trying to keep warm! The garage is FREEZING! I've been down here the last couple of nights!

Willie: [uneasy] Were you here, Sunday night?

ALF: [winks] Don't worry, I was sound asleep. Didn't hear a THING.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Mother and Child Reunion
Tagged: Hiding, didn't hear a thing
“ALF: Um, excuse me, sir. Can I have a word with you?

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: Who said that?

ALF: I did. Could you take some constructive criticism? What you're doing here is wrong.

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: [Looks at ALF with a flashlight] Heh heh. Must be one of them talking dolls.

ALF: Oh yeah? Ever had a talking doll rip out your voice box?

Andrew Seminick, Burglar: HUH? AAAUGH! [jumps out the bedroom window, scared]”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Strangers in the Night
Tagged: Burglar, Intimidation
“Willie: What are you playing?

ALF: [at a video game] Space Invaders.

Willie: What do they do? Live in your garage, eat all your food, dig up your back yard?

ALF: You're in a mood...

Willie: Yes, I am! Because I found my good hoe, in THIS condition!

[holds up a pole with a bit of mangled scrap iron on one end]

ALF: Oh, yeah. Sorry. I was plowing up your yard and I hit a water main... Don't worry, it wasn't yours.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 1: Border Song
Tagged: Video Games, space invaders
“Willie Tanner: ALF!

Flakey Pete: [walks into the kitchen] Oh. Hi Willie.

Willie Tanner: Where is he?

Flakey Pete: Who? Your little alien guy?

Willie Tanner: If anything... anything has happened to him, you're gonna be...

ALF: Hey. Willie.

Willie Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Willie Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Brian Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Lynn Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie!

Kate Tanner: ALF!

ALF: Willie?”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Turkey in the Straw
Tagged: greetings, Mistaken Identity
“ALF: ELVIS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!

Willie Tanner: That was not Elvis Presley.

ALF: Are you kidding?, he was on that sandwich like red beans on rice.

Lynn Tanner: He didn't seem like Elvis to me either.

ALF: Elvis was a brilliant actor. He could play anything from a singing race car driver to a singing deep sea diver.”
— ALF (voice), ALF, Season 3: Suspicious Minds
Tagged: Elvis, Elvis Presley, Elvis Has Left The Building
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