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Ed Norton Quotes

Total quotes: 6
“Ed Norton: [Ralph tries to figure out what to leave Alice in his will] Look, as long as you're going, anyway, why don't you sell your body to science? If they pay by the pound, she'll be left a millionaire!

Ralph: Why don't you shut up?”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Masquerade
Tagged: Living Will, Fat-Shaming
“Like we say in the sewer, 'time and tide wait for no man'.”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Ralph Kramden, Inc.
Tagged: Sewer, Time and Tide
“In the words of the immortal bard, Shakespeare, 'There are three times in a man's life when he wants to be alone: one, when he's communing with his thoughts; two, when he's being tender with his wife; and three, when he's in the isolation booth on 'The $64,000 Question'.'”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Lost Job
Tagged: shakespeare, Game Shows, Alone, Solitude
“Ralph Kramden, you just lost your membership card to the human race!”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Easter Hats
Tagged: human race
“I, Edward Norton, Ranger Third Class in the Captain Video Ranger Academy, do solemnly pledge to obey my mommy and daddy, to be kind to dumb animals and old ladies in and out of space, not to tease my little brothers and sisters and to brush my teeth twice a day and drink milk after every meal.”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: The New Bowling Ball
Tagged: Pledge, Captain Video, Obey, Brush Your Teeth, Drink Milk
“Dick Gersh: Tell me, Dr. Norton, what school did you attend?

Ed Norton: P.S., 31 Oyster Bay.

Dick Gersh: No, I mean, what medical school?

Ralph: Oh, uh, he went to Oxford.

Dick Gersh: Oh, in England.

Ed Norton: Is that where it is?

Dick Gersh: You mean you went to school in Oxford and you don't know it's in England?

Ed Norton: Well, to tell you the truth, sir, it was so foggy over there, I don't know where it was.”
— Ed Norton, The Honeymooners, Season 1: Masquerade
Tagged: Oxford, England, Bluffing, foggy
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