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Carrie Brownstein Quotes

Total quotes (12)

Carrie Brownstein

Carrie Brownstein

Birthname

Birthday September 27, 1974

Educated At The Evergreen State College

Nationality United States Of America, United States

Occupations Television Actor, Singer, Musician, Blogger, Guitarist

Characters Portrayed

Total quotes (12)

Mayor: Hey, I just got back from Baltimore.

Various Characters: Great, that’s a great city.

Mayor: It’s a great city.

— Mayor (Kyle MacLachlan), Portlandia, Season 1: Baseball

baltimore obsequious

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I feel terribly constantly. Constantly. I just don't even exist in this. Like you are not listening to me. I don't understand. Stop yelling at me and making me feel bad about this.

— Syd Feldman (Carrie Brownstein), Transparent, Season 1: Looking Up

terrible Exist not listening Yelling Bad

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Josh wants to see it in your eyes that you love him. You never met anyone like him before.

— Syd Feldman (Carrie Brownstein), Transparent, Season 1: Why Do We Cover the Mirrors?

Eyes love him crazy

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I'll be your Santa Claus if you want, and I'll be every goddamn elf you want.

— Dave (Fred Armisen), Portlandia, Season 5: 4th of July BBQs

Santa Claus Elf Fantasy role playing

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I will hold your hand and go out into the street and make us both get hit by a car that'll push us into another car, and we'll go back and forth all day, being hit by cars, holding hands real tight, and I will not let go.

— Candace (Fred Armisen), Portlandia, Season 3: Missionaries

Threats Hysteria

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Portland's a city where young people go to retire.

— Jason (Fred Armisen), Portlandia, Season 1: Farm

Portland Slackers

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What a journal should be is a document of misery.

— Toni (Carrie Brownstein), Portlandia, Season 1: Baseball

Journaling Misery

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Put a bird on it!

— Lance (Fred Armisen), Portlandia, Season 1: A Song for Portland

put a bird on it Cliches

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Every time you point I see a penis.

— Toni (Carrie Brownstein), Portlandia, Season 1: A Song for Portland

feminism Hallucinating Penises Phallic

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People tell me my body looks like a melted candle.

— nina (Carrie Brownstein), Portlandia, Season 1: A Song for Portland

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Press one for shut up and go home!

— Candace (Fred Armisen), Portlandia, Season 3: Blackout

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You are a vaginal learner.

— Syd Feldman (Carrie Brownstein), Transparent, Season 1: Looking Up

learner Vagina Sex Organs

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Related quotes to Carrie Brownstein tagged Terrible, Exist, Bad

I don't hate it. I just don't like it at all and it's terrible.

— Michael Scott (Steve Carell), The Office, Season 4: Launch Party (1)

Hate terrible don't like it

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Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.

— Mother Teresa, Mother Teresa Quotes

Lonely Feeling terrible Poverty

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Oh, he's a terrible person! He is a terrible, terrible... dreamboat. Like, it's weird how good looking he is. Right? It's like he's chiseled out of evil marble.

— Paula Proctor (Donna Lynne Champlin), Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Season 2: When Do I Get to Spend Time with Josh?

terrible Weird Evil Good Looking Attractive

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When I told a boyfriend something was 'no big deal,' it meant anything from 'I just bought weed from your nephew,' to 'I secretly befriended your ex-girlfriend last year, things got out of hand, and now I'm her bridesmaid.'

— Eleanor Shellstrop (Kristen Bell), The Good Place, Season 1: Category 55 Emergency Doomsday Crisis

joke terrible Boyfriend Relationship

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Truth is as terrible as death.

— Hawthorne Abendsen (Stephen Root), The Man in the High Castle, Season 2: The Tiger's Cave

Truth terrible Death

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It may be difficult to believe, but, at any given moment, someone somewhere is in a dangerous situation and other people in some other place are dancing and having a good time. The world is often like this. A celebration here, terrible trouble just outside the door.

— Lemony Snicket (Patrick Warburton), A Series of Unfortunate Events, Season 2: The Ersatz Elevator: Part Two

difficult dangerous situation World Celebration terrible trouble

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You did a terrible thing, but just because you made one bad move, or 30, doesn’t mean you can’t make a good one now.

— Regina Mills (Lana Parrilla), Once Upon a Time, Season 5: Ruby Slippers

terrible Good Move Bad Move mistake Redemption

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The terrible thing is that people who are madmen in private may wear a totally bland and innocent expression in public.

— Akira Kurosawa, Something Like An Autobiography

terrible People madmen private wear bland innocent expression public

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Lemon, you look terrible, and I once watched you eat oysters while you had a cold

— Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin), 30 Rock, Season 5: I Heart Connecticut

terrible eating Oysters Messy Sick disgusting

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I think you’ve got several options. They’re all terrible…but you have them.

— Chris Traeger, Parks and Recreation

humor Funny Options Choices terrible

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Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel better about a terrible situation.

— Lemony Snicket, The Bad Beginning: Or, Orphans! (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 1)

terrible solidarity Life situations

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I always wanted a daughter. My kids are not daughters, they're terrible. I'll tell you about it later - or now.

— Paula Proctor (Donna Lynne Champlin), Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Season 1: Josh’s Girlfriend is Really Cool!

Daughter kids terrible

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A truth that is often difficult for people to recognize or accept is: if you can see it out there, it exists—or has at some point existed— within you.

— Iyanla Vanzant, via twitter.com

Truth Difficult Times Recognize Accept Exist within you

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