2,218 quotes curated by Heidi Priebe:
“I'm worried that if they ever make a movie of my life, the tagline will be 'Get him.'”
Tagged:
humor
“Before we met I was so scared of dying. But if the end comes today, this will have been enough.”
Tagged:
humor
“I am a pacifist and I will be a pacifist until I die or someone threatens my mother.”
Tagged:
humor
“I want people to tell their children terrifying stories about the things we did for love.”
Tagged:
humor
“I get a crazy impulse when you smile at me. Like I want to step in front of buses in a good way.”
Tagged:
humor
“It turns out I don't really want to have sex. I guess I just got confused because you're so great!”
Tagged:
humor
“If you died, I would go through hell to bring you back. That would be easy. I'm not sure how to deal with us just drifting apart.”
Tagged:
humor