She may be one of the gifted children of Alice Miller’s Drama Of The Gifted Child, who discovers that a modicum of safety (safety the ultimate aim of all four of the 4F responses) can be purchased by becoming useful to the parent. Servitude, ingratiation, and forfeiture of any needs that might inconvenience and ire the parent become the most important survival strategies available.”
Trauma therapist Pete Walker discusses the four 'F' types of defensive survival responses that develop due to trauma. In this quote, he specifically speaks about the 'fawn' response, using the example of an abused child who becomes 'safe' in her household by becoming servile to her abusers. This form of codependency and people-pleasing is very common among abuse survivors who learn that in order to be safe, they have to comply with the needs of their abusers. This type of response is also commonly seen in the phenomenon of Stockholm Syndrome and trauma bonding, where the abuse victim seems to develop a strong bond with his or her assailant due to the traumatic nature of the abuse.
Explore more quotes:
About the author
This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.
Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.
Kendra Syrdal is a writer, editor, partner, and senior publisher for The Thought & Expression Company. Over the last few years she has been personally responsible for writing, editing, and producing over 30+ million pageviews on Thought Catalog.