Ebenezer Scrooge: Marley! Where am I?
Jacob Marley's Ghost: I should have thought it was obvious. I heard you were coming down today, so I thought I'd come to greet you, show you to your quarters. Nobody else wanted to.
Ebenezer Scrooge: That's... that's very civil of you, Marley. I...I...I...I am dead, aren't I?
Jacob Marley's Ghost: As a coffin nail.
Ebenezer Scrooge: I...I had rather hoped I'd end up in Heaven.
Jacob Marley's Ghost: Did you, indeed? You may find your office here rather small, but not, I trust, unfamiliar.
Ebenezer Scrooge: Office?
Jacob Marley's Ghost: Your activities in life were so pleasing to Lucifer that he has appointed you to be his personal clerk. A singular honor. You will be to him, so to speak, what Bob Cratchit was to you.
Ebenezer Scrooge: That's not fair! It's... it's...
Jacob Marley's Ghost: Diabolical. I must confess, I find it not altogether unamusing.”
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