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Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes

“Ray: Listen dad, when was the last time you said I love you to someone?

Frank: What? Do you live in a freaking fairyland?”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: I Love You
Tagged: Love, said i love you, Sassy, freaking, fairyland
“I can't compete with your mother's turkey Ray, the woman has giblets in her blood!”
— Debra Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Turkey or Fish
Tagged: Compete, Turkey, Blood, Natural, giblets
“Debra: Oh nothing at all, except Ray was just about to tell Ally the truth about Santa Claus.

Marie: You what?!?!
 
Ray: NO, I didn't tell her.
 
Marie: My own son, an atheist?!?!”
— Marie Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: The Ball
Tagged: Truth, santa clause, Son, Atheist, Overreaction
“Hold the ho's, I want to talk to you for a minute.”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: The Ball
Tagged: talk, Minute, Christmas
“Did you just have sex with me because my mother told you to?”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 2: Golf
Tagged: Sex, mother, Instructions
“Okay, the meatballs are not exactly like my mother's, but I am saying to you: We have a house...we have a car...our student loans are paid off. You should be able to sleep!”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 2: Marie's Meatballs
Tagged: Meatballs, mother's cooking, House, Car, student loans, Sleep
“Marie: Don't move! I'm coming right down!

Frank: I'm in enough pain!”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 6: Frank Goes Downstairs
Tagged: don't move, Sassy, enough pain
“Laughter's the best medicine, right? I'm keeping it loose, keeping it light.”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 4: Robert's Rodeo
Tagged: Laughter Is The Best Medicine, Loose, Light, Happy
“Oh, where are you throwing that ball?! Come on! Have an idea out there!”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 2: T-Ball
Tagged: throwing, balls, idea, Sassy, sideline coaching
“Guilt! That means love! I had to come home and confess!”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 2: Golf
Tagged: Guilt, Love, Home, Confess
“I could have eaten a box of alphabets and crapped a better interview!”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 2: Ray's on TV
Tagged: food, alphabets, crapped, better, Interview, Sassy
“Mommy is just wrestling daddy.”
— Debra Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: The Ball
Tagged: Wrestling, Sex, mommy, Daddy
“Debra: You know I gave up some stuff when we had kids.

Ray: I know...did it have to be sex?”
— Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Captain Nemo
Tagged: giving up stuff, Sex, upset, kids, Sacrifices
“It's the celery that makes 'tuna salad' tuna salad. What you gave me was tuna slop!”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Your Place or Mine?
Tagged: Tuna, Celery, slop, upset, picky
“I've got the complete works of Arnold Schwarzenegger, except the one where he gets pregnant.”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Your Place or Mine?
Tagged: complete works, Arnold Schwarzenegger, pregnant
“Ray: You know I read somewhere where the happiest marriages are the ones where the man is smarter.

Debra: Oh, guess who wrote that...”
— Debra Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Standard Deviation
Tagged: Read, Happiest, marriages, Man, Smarter, Sassy, biased
“You know that shampoo that says 'no more tears' on the bottle? There's tears.”
— Robert Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: I Love You
Tagged: Shampoo, false advertising, no more tears, Tears, stings
“The movies? Some people get to live it up.”
— Marie Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Movies, Sassy, live it up
“I'm sucking the youth!”
— Frank Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: sucking, Youth, exclamation
“I can't talk, there's too much fruit in the house.”
— Marie Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: can't talk, Fruit, House, upset
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