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Seth Cohen Quotes

Total quotes: 27
“Dude, you're a Cohen now. Welcome to a life of insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Debut
Tagged: Insecurity, Welcome, Self-Doubt, Paralyzing, joke, Snarky, Sassy
“The master race has been perfected, Ryan, and they all go to our school.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Heights
Tagged: Master Race, Perfection, School, wealthy, Attractive, Snarky, joke
“Jimmy: So, how's your mother?

Seth: Ahh, just... married.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Gamble
Tagged: mother, Son, married, awkward, tension, joke, humor
“Anna: Oh, so insulting him counts as conversation?

Seth: Oh, well. If it doesn't, we've never spoken.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Heights
Tagged: Insult, Insulting, Conversation, Speak, awkward, Snarky, Sassy, humor
“Seth: So when you lost your virginity, I was playing 'Magic: the Gathering.'

Ryan: You still play Magic.

Seth: Yeah, but not as much.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Perfect Couple
Tagged: Magic: The Gathering, Magic, Virginity, Sex, joke, Sassy
“Seth: How was the mall?

Ryan: Eh... Weird.

Seth: Yes. You've really painted a picture for me. I feel like I was there.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Best Chrismukkah Ever
Tagged: mall, Weird, picture, descriptive, Witty, humor, Snarky, sarcastic, Sarcasm
“It turns out that I'm quite skilled at getting a date, provided it's not for me.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Outsider
Tagged: Date, Skilled, joke, Sassy, Snarky
“Caleb: Seth! Ah... You're still not a football player.

Seth: Ha, no, but thank you.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Girlfriend
Tagged: Football, Insult, Thank You, Sassy, Snarky, Rude
“Seth: Is it twisted if I find my potential grandma really hot?

Ryan: Not when she looks like that.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Girlfriend
Tagged: Grandma, Twisted, Hot, Attractive, joke, Sassy, awkward
“Seth: Summer, can I walk you to class?

Summer: I can walk myself.

Seth: Great, then you can walk me, too.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Perfect Couple
Tagged: Walk, couple, flirty, Cute, humor, Feminist, Relationships
“Do you know what I dream about when I dream about Thanksgiving, which is a lot? I dream that I eat so much deliciousness that all the blood rushes to my stomach and I pass out right at the table. Please do not deny me that.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Homecoming
Tagged: Thanksgiving, food, Eat, Holidays, Delicious, Pass Out, Deny, humor, joke
“Alex: That's sweet. It's pathetic but sweet.

Seth: Yeah, that's my niche. Pathetic and sweet.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 2: The New Kids on the Block
Tagged: sweet, pathetic, Niche, Cute, humor, Witty
“Gabrielle: Fifth grade? Okay, she needs to change that. She's known that guy since he's been eating paste.

Seth: I think he still does.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Girlfriend
Tagged: Fifth Grade, Elementary School, Paste, Dating, Boyfriend, Snarky, Sassy, Insult
“Seth: What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico.

Ryan: What happens in Mexico?

Seth: I don't know, because it stays there. That's why we must go!”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Escape
Tagged: Mexico, Secret, travel, joke, Sassy, humor
“Summer: You were in the comic book club?

Seth: Yeah. I was the president and only member.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Proposal
Tagged: Comic Books, Comics, President, pathetic, Sad
“What are we we do, man? I don't want to get thrown out of the hotel. I love the hotel. I wanna marry the hotel and have little gambling-addicted alcoholic kids with it.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Strip
Tagged: hotel, Bachelor Party, Vegas, Gambling, Addiction, kids, Witty
“Do you want to play Grand Theft Auto? It's pretty cool. You can like, steal cars and... not that that's cool. Or uncool. I don't know... um...”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: Premiere
Tagged: joke, Grand Theft Auto, Video Games, Pop Culture, awkward, steal, cool, Uncool
“Seth: Not now, Mom. I'm studying naked.

Summer: Eww.

Seth: Summer?

Summer: What kind of family do you have, Cohen?

Seth: The kind where mothers and sons always wear clothing. Even in the shower.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Rescue
Tagged: Naked, studying, School, Mom, Son, Family, Clothes, shower, joke, awkward, humor
“Seth: My friend Ryan, he's really cool, okay? He's very anti-establishment. He enjoys sunset walks on the beach, punching people, and not smiling.

Alex: And that's how you see me?

Seth: Yeah. Only with less smiling.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 2: The New Era
Tagged: Anti-Establishment, Sunset, beach, Punching, Violence, frowning, Grumpy, smiling, Witty
“Never underestimate a parent's ability to mortify his child.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 2: The SnO.C.
Tagged: underestimate, parent, Parents and Children, Son, Child, Witty, humor
“Sandy: If you can't tell your dad, who can you tell?

Seth: Gee, I don't know. Ryan, Mom, that tree over there.

Sandy: You're gonna miss me when I'm gone.

Seth: When are you leaving?”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Rescue
Tagged: Dad, Son, Family, Miss, Leave, Snarky, Sassy, Insult, Secret
“Seth: So, what's it gonna be, huh? You want your menorah or a candy cane? Christmas or Hanukkah?

Ryan: Uh...

Seth: Don't worry about it, buddy, because in this house, you don't have to choose. Allow me to introduce you to a little something I like to call... Chrismukkah.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Best Chrismukkah Ever
Tagged: Christmas, hanukkah, Holidays, Christianity, Judaism, Menorah, Candy Cane, Chrismukkah, Witty
“Lit as fuck, man. There was titties, beer, a lot of candy.”
— Spencer Diaz, American Vandal, Season 1: Premature Theories
Tagged: lit, party, Beer, candy
“Anna: Could you be any more pathetic? A lone figure sitting on the floor, wondering if he's gonna be lonely for the rest of his life.

Seth: Hey, your sensitivity — it's really, uh, nonexistent.

Anna: You know what your problem is? You're not a man.

Seth: Again, not appreciating the brutal honesty.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Debut
Tagged: pathetic, Lonely, Sensitivity, Insensitive, Man, Brutal Honesty, Honesty, joke, humor
“Seth: Ryan, that's extremely minty of you. I didn't even know they had musicals in Chino. I didn't even know they had dancing, or... laughter.

Ryan: That's because no one who lived there is as funny as you.

Seth: So, we finally agree I'm the funny one. Well, look at that! Looks like we all learned some valuable lessons this Thanksgiving.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Homecoming
Tagged: Thanksgiving, Holidays, Witty, humor, Minty, Musicals, Dancing, Laughter, Funny, Sassy
“Luke: Maybe I can just blow the whole thing off, go hit the beach, give everybody time to get it out of their systems.

Ryan: It doesn't work like that. It's been months and I'm still the kid from Chino that burned a house down.

Marissa: And I'm still the girl who tried to kill herself in Mexico.

Seth: And I'm still the... I'm still Seth Cohen.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Secret
Tagged: beach, Arson, Suicide Attempts, joke, Sassy, Snarky, humor
“Seth: So what's the GP, RA?

Ryan: I have no idea what you just said.

Seth: Game plan, Ryan Atwood.

Ryan: You're just using initials now?

Seth: Yeah. They save time.

Ryan: Well, not if you have to translate.

Seth: GP.

Ryan: Game Plan?

Seth: Good Point.”
— Seth Cohen, The O.C., Season 1: The Nana
Tagged: Initials, Game Plan, Translate, Millennials, Witty, humor
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