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Niles Crane Quotes

Total quotes: 7
“ I've always liked the notion of meeting the great figures of history. But then I think: what if it's like high school and all the really cool dead people don't want to hang out with me? Mozart'll tell me he's busy but then later I'll see him out with Shakespeare and Lincoln!”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 4: Death and the Dog
Tagged: great figures, History, high school, ditched, Mozart, Busy, shakespeare, lincoln
“I really must go. I'm hosting a seminar on multiple personality disorders and it takes me forever to fill out the name tags.”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 1: Oops
Tagged: Host, Seminar, Multiple Personality Disorder, Forever, name tags
“Sherry: Oh, I love making people laugh. To me, humor is like medicine!

Niles: I guess we're in the placebo group.”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 4: Dad Loves Sherry, the Boys Just Whine
Tagged: Simile Examples, laugh, humor, placebo group, Sassy
“It is possible to move a relationship along too fast, and ultimately marry too hastily. You could find, a few years down the line, that the person isn't really right for you, and then what happens if you meet the right person?”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 2: Adventures in Paradise
Tagged: Relationship, Fast, Marriage, Right Person
“I really must run. I'm due at my sexual addiction group, and I don't like to leave them alone for too long.”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 1: And the Whimper is...
Tagged: Sex Addiction, Excuses To Leave
“Frasier: The other day I was asked out by this twenty-two year old girl that I met in a mall. 

Niles: That is alarming. 

Frasier: Well, I turned her down. 

Niles: No, no, you were in a mall. Did anyone see you?”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 1: Fortysomething
Tagged: Rich People Hate Malls, Insults To Mall Culture, Malls of America
“Martin: When your mother got mad at me, I'd just grab her, bend her backwards and give her a kiss that made her glad she was a woman.

Niles: I can't do that with Maris. She has abnormally rigid vertebrae; she'd snap like a twig.”
— Niles Crane, Frasier, Season 2: Daphne's Room
Tagged: kiss, Mad, Fighting, Woman, snap like a twig, Simile Examples
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