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Bill Haverchuck Quotes

Total quotes: 6
“Alan White: Shut up, you little girl.

Bill Haverchuck: I'm not a little girl, I'm a bionic woman.”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: Tricks and Treats
Tagged: Little Girl, Bionic Woman, Cross Dressing, Halloween Costumes
“Ma'am, I hope there aren't any peanuts in these peanuts.”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: Tricks and Treats
Tagged: Allergies, Peanuts
“[prank calling] Fredericks? You're a turd. A stinky f-fat turd. Go sniff a jock strap, you poop head. You love patting boys' butts. You love patting boys' butts. Butt...you butt-patter! You're a perv and a loser... and a stinky...t-turd!
[hangs up]”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: The Diary
Tagged: Fredericks of Hollywood, Prank Calls, Jock Strap, Butts, Loser, turd
“I don't really like jokes. I don't think they're funny.”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: Tests and Breasts
Tagged: Jokes, Funny, Irony
“Bill Haverchuck: I just hope I get candy I can eat. I'm allergic to peanuts, licorice, and nougat.

Neal Schweiber: How can you possibly be allergic to nougat?
[Sam laughs]

Bill Haverchuck: I don't know. My doctor says I'm allergic to more things than anyone he's ever seen.”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: Tricks and Treats
Tagged: Allergies, Nougat, Peanuts, Licorice
“Bill Haverchuck: You remember when we said we'd tell each other everything?

Neal Schweiber: Yeah.

Bill Haverchuck: Did you mean it?

Neal Schweiber: Of course.

Bill Haverchuck: Even if it's
something really, really horrible? I mean, it might not be horrible, 'cause it might not be true, but if it is true, it could be pretty horrible.

Neal Schweiber: Okay, Bill, you're killin' me. You gotta tell me now.”
— Bill Haverchuck, Freaks and Geeks, Season 1: The Garage Door
Tagged: Secrets
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