Peter Gibbons: [Explaining the plan] All right, so when the sub routine compounds the interest is uses all these extra decimal places that just get rounded off. So we simplified the whole thing, we rounded them all down, drop the remainder into an account we opened. Joanna: [Confused] So you're…
Catalog
Peter Gibbons
Peter Gibbons (born July 9, 1962) was the champion of the CASCAR Super Series in 1999 and 200
Bob Slydell: Would you bear with me for just a second here? Peter Gibbons: Okay. Bob Slydell: What if—and believe me this is hypothetical—but what if you were offered some kind of a stock option equity sharing program? Would that do anything for you? Peter Gibbons: I don't know, I guess. Listen, I'm…
Bob Slydell: You see, what we're trying to do is get a feeling for how people spend their time at work so if you would, would you walk us through a typical day, for you? Peter Gibbons: Yeah. Bob Slydell: Great. Peter Gibbons: Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late, ah, I use the…
Peter Gibbons: It's not just about me and my dream of doing nothing. It's about all of us. I don't know what happened to me at that hypnotherapist and, I don't know, maybe it was just shock and it's wearing off now, but when I saw that fat man keel over and die—Michael, we don't have a lot of time…
Peter Gibbons: You see, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't even care. Bob Porter: Don’t—don't care? Peter Gibbons: It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my ass off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see another dime, so where's the motivation? And here's…
Bob Porter: Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately. Peter Gibbons: Well, I wouldn't exactly say I've been missing it, Bob.
Peter Gibbons: So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life. Dr. Swanson: What about today? Is today the…
Joanna: So, where do you work, Peter? Peter Gibbons: Initech. Joanna: Ini—yeah, what do you do there? Peter Gibbons: I sit in a cubicle and I update bank software for the 2000 switch. Joanna: What's that? Peter Gibbons: Well see, they wrote all this bank software, and, uh, to save space, they used…
Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars? Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time, man. Peter Gibbons: [laughs] That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time? Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man.…
We don't have a lot of time on this Earth! We weren't meant to spend it this way! Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements!
I did absolutely nothing and it was everything I thought it could be.