Jake Johnson Quotes

Total quotes (12)

Jake Johnson

Jake Johnson

Birthname

AKA Mark Jake Johnson Weinberger, Jake Johnson

Birthday May 28, 1978

Birthplace Evanston, Illinois, United States

Educated At University Of Iowa, Tisch School Of The Arts, New York University

Nationality United States Of America

Occupations Actor, Comedian, Television Actor

Characters Portrayed

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Total quotes (12)

Kai: I hate this. I just wanna sit around and do nothing, but that is not hot.
Nick: That's hot to me. You add some sweatpants to that and that is better than porn.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 4: Girl Fight

Relationship Goals Lazy days Couple Goals

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Hey everyone I'm Julius Pepperwood, ex-cop, ex-marine...I'm from Chicago. Thin crust pizza? No thank you, I'm from Chicago.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Pepperwood

Pizza Jokes Chicago Impersonations

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I know this isn’t gonna end well, but the whole middle part is going to be awesome.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Quick Hardening Caulk

Life Adventures Mistakes

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I like getting older, I feel like I’m aging into my personality.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Neighbors

Aging Personality Growing Up

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Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Halloween

Regrets Mistakes Memories

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Look at that font! What is this? Amateur hour? At least use Palatino.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Pepperwood

Jokes for Writers Name that Font

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She's got that giant heart that's part compass and part flashlight and she's just the greatest person I have ever met.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 6: San Diego

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I am one more black gay kid getting punched in the face away from a nervous breakdown.

— Principal Dadier (Jake Johnson), 21 Jump Street

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I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less doughnuts.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), House, Season 1: Kids

Exercise healthy eating

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Look at those horny horny hippos.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 7: About Three Years Later

Funny Quotes Animal Jokes

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It’s a weird life, but it’s where I’m at right now.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 6: House Hunt

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Life sucks. And then it gets better. And then it sucks again.

— Nick Miller (Jake Johnson), New Girl, Season 2: Re-launch

Life Misery It Gets Better

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I swear I couldn't love you more than I do right now, and yet I know I will tomorrow.

— Leo Christopher, Instagram

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If I had to dream up the perfect woman, she wouldn’t even come close to you.

— Cory Matthews, Boy Meets World Complete Series

Relationship Goals Relationships Perfect Woman Cute Things To Say To Her

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A person should set his goals as early as he can and devote all his energy and talent to getting there. With enough effort, he may achieve it. Or he may find something that is even more rewarding. But in the end, no matter what the outcome, he will know he has been alive.

— Walt Disney, Walt Disney, Magician of the Movies

Dreams Goals goal-driven Achieving dreams Life Living Success Inspirational

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Don’t let your luggage define your travels, each life unravels differently.

— Shane Koyczan, To This Day: For the Bullied and Beautiful

Life Goals purpose

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If this is the only life, then why am I not just doing everything I want to do?

— James Franco, Thirty Seconds To Mars - City Of Angels - James Franco via YouTube

Life Living living and dreaming Doing What You Want Dreams Goals Disappointments frustrations

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I started making plans, thinking we would get that far.

— Daniel Handler, Why We Broke Up

couple Relationship Regrets Heartbroken Disappointments

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Intimacy is the capacity to be rather weird with someone - and finding that that’s ok with them.

— Alain de Botton, The Course of Love: A Novel

Intimacy Relationship Cute Love

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Our relationship wasn't the sun, the moon, the stars, but it wasn't bullshit, either.

— Junot Dìaz, This Is How You Lose Her

Love Relationship Dating

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The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.

— C. G. Jung, Human Chemistry (Volume Two)

Relationship Matching Up Love

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I like you to be exactly the way that you are, because in all my experience, I have never known anyone like you.

— Nicholas Pagan, A Streetcar Named Desire (1951)

Be yourself Relationship Love

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It seemed like you could know me. Like you could understand anything I told you. And the more we spoke, I knew why. The same things excited us. The same things concerned us.

— Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why

Friendship Relationship Love Others

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Everybody is a main character to someone.

— Amy Harmon, Making Faces

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When two people fall in love and suspect they are made for each other, the thing is to have the courage to break it off, for by continuing they have everything to lose and nothing to gain.

— Søren Kierkegaard, Either/Or: A Fragment Of Life

Love Relationship

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