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Howard Borden Quotes

Total quotes: 4
“Howard Borden: Hi, Bob. Do you think I should be buried or cremated?

Dr. Robert 'Bob' Hartley: Howard, I've always felt you should be bronzed.”
— Howard Borden, The Bob Newhart Show, Season 4: The Longest Good-Bye
Tagged: burial, Cremation, Bronzing
“Ellen Hartley: Howard, I want to tell you something but I don't want you getting all jealous.

Howard Borden: You don't have to worry about that anymore. I don't have a jealous bone in my whole body.

Dr. Robert 'Bob' Hartley: I'm surprised you can walk.”
— Howard Borden, The Bob Newhart Show, Season 3: Tobin's Back in Town
Tagged: Jealous, Literal
“[Howard's just returned home from a flight to Paris, and finds he's been robbed—of everything—except his broken vacuum. Bob and Emily are in his barren living room, trying to help Howard get a grasp on the situation] I don't know what to do. I mean; where do you start? [Howard scratches his head, and looks forlorn] I mean...how do you decorate an apartment around a vacuum cleaner?”
— Howard Borden, The Bob Newhart Show, Season 2: Clink Shrink
Tagged: Robbery, apartment decoration, vacuum cleaner
“Emily Hartley: [Howard—dressed like Tobin, in head-to-toe leather, and Ellen are over at Bob and Emily's. John Tobin's left—finally] Howard, you are incredible.

Howard Borden: I don't mean to be. I just want my girl back, that's all.

Ellen Hartley: [laughing] Oh, Howard... [smiling, and looking at Howard]
...you never lost me.

Howard Borden: [Quietly, looking at Ellen] I didn't?

Ellen Hartley: [Ellen mumbles 'no'] Hmmm. But, why did you have to act so crazy? I mean, all you had to do is stay out of it, and let me handle it in my own way.

Howard Borden: [Howard instantly points at Bob] Bob told me to do it.

Dr. Robert 'Bob' Hartley: [Quizzically] What?

Howard Borden: [Shrugs his shoulders] You told me to 'go with my feelings.'

Dr. Robert 'Bob' Hartley: [Bob looks at Emily] Well, yeah, but, I-I didn't charge you for it.

Emily Hartley: Howard; I'm sure Bob didn't tell you to go out and buy a leather sweatsuit, or, or to spend a fortune in overseas phone calls. Or come to the airport dressed like Snoopy!”
— Howard Borden, The Bob Newhart Show, Season 3: Tobin's Back in Town
Tagged: Dating, Desperation, blaming, snoopy
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