We’re in the midst of a reckoning. It’s what toxic masculinity’s own medicine tastes like. And people should allow the consequences to unfold, regardless of how it affects those they consider to be friends.
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Quotes tagged ‘toxic masculinity’
Why do we need to talk about the redemption of men when we are right in the middle of the salvation of women? Not even the middle, but the very beginning? Why are we obligated to care about salvaging male careers when we have just begun to tell the stories that have plagued us for lifetimes? It seem…
You have to survive. So you go into survival mode, and when you go into survival mode what happen? You shut down all emotions. So even with women, you gonna shut down emotionally, so you can't connect ... And then all the things happen from there: infidelity.
— Jay Z, nytimes.com
i am relieved. when i see the feminine presence in a man's eyes. it means he is a peace i do not have to bring to him.
We always ask why we don't see women in top leadership positions, but we never ask why we see so many men in these jobs. These positions often require long, stressful hours that may not be worth it if you want a balanced and fulfilling life. Status is the primary metric that men are judged on, pushi…
'Boys will be boys' means that men are forever getting a free pass on bad behavior.
We live in a culture that breeds people who are terrified of women who exercise bodily autonomy — especially when that autonomy involves decision-making around sex and family planning. When you combine that fear with a society that tells men they are entitled to women’s bodies, time, attention and a…
I think my biggest ‘huh’ moment with respect to gender roles is when it was pointed out to me that your typical ‘geek’ is just as hypermasculine as your typical ‘jock’ when you look at it from the right angle. As male geeks, a great deal of our identity is built on the notion that male geeks are, in…
Masculinity is a double-edged sword for a lot of men, even if they’ve never given thought to the subject—especially black men who have the desire to break away from the stereotypes. On the one hand, it would be great to expand the boundaries of what it means to be a man in this society. Why can’t we…
Boys are taught, sometimes with the best of intentions, to mutate their emotional suffering into anger... Despite the emergence of the metrosexual and an increase in stay-at-home dads, tough-guy stereotypes die hard. As men continue to fall behind women in college, while outpacing them four to one i…
All men support and perpetuate sexism and sexist oppression in one form or another … Like women, men have been socialized to passively accept sexist ideology. While they need not blame themselves for accepting sexism, they must assume responsibility for eliminating it.
In patriarchal culture men are not allowed to simply be who they are and glory in their unique identity. Their value is always determined by what they do. In an anti-patriarchal culture males do not have to prove their value and worth. They know from birth that simply being gives them value, the rig…
We know from 40 years of research that the younger boys get to porn, the more it limits their capacity for intimacy, the more it decreases their empathy for rape victims, the more it increases depression and anxiety, and the more likely they are to engage in risky sexual behavior... now we have a ge…
I want you to think what it means to be male and grow up in a culture where before you can even speak, females are offering themselves to you, "Come get me! Come get me!"
Explain to me how you can live in a culture saturated with pornography and how people ignore these messages.
You cannot bring up boys on (porn) and not have that play out in the real world. How it will play out? Some will rape and become sexual sadists, some will just rape and not become sadists, some will nag their girlfriends. But mostly what you're doing is destroying the capacity for intimacy in men.
Feminists are your best friends. We are the only one rooting for your humanity, we are the only ones who say you are better than this. Because if my son is worth better than this, your sons are worth better than this. Because how dare you define my son as a predator who doesn't give a shit about wom…
Now there you have a sample of man’s ‘reasoning powers,’ as he calls them. He observes certain facts. For instance, that in all his life he never sees the day that he can satisfy one woman; also, that no woman ever sees the day that she can’t overwork, and defeat, and put out of commission any ten m…