Quotes tagged ‘PG Funny’

(32 total)

“Q: What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down? A: It gets toad away.”

“Q: What has more lives than a cat? A: A frog because it croaks every night.”

“Q: If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have? A: Big hands.”

“Q: What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? A: You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish.”

“Q: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? A: It's okay. He woke up.”

“Q: How do you find Will Smith in the snow? A: You look for the fresh prints.”

“Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.”

“Why did the can crusher quit his job. Because it was soda pressing.”

“Q: What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A: One is really heavy, the other’s a little lighter.”

“Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: ‘Put it on my bill.’”

“Why did the painting go to jail? It was framed.”

“What did the right eye say to the left eye. Between you and me, something smells.”

“Q: Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play instruments? A: Mount Rushmore.”

“What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.”

“Q: Why were they called the Dark Ages? A: Because there were lots of knights.”

“Q: What does the world’s top dentist get? A: A little plaque.”

“Have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu; you get what you deserve.”

“Q: What is white when it's dirty and black when it's clean? A: A chalkboard.”

“Q: How do trees access the internet? A: They log in.”

“Q: What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? A: ‘You're too young to smoke.’”