Quotes tagged ‘Monkey’

“Cousin Eddie: I haven't seen a beatin' like that since somebody stuck a banana in my pants and turned a monkey loose. Clark Griswold: Thanks for the pick-me-up, Eddie.”

— Elisa Bell, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, imdb.com

“You know the damage one ignorant Negro can do? We were in France in the first war; we'd won decorations. But the white boys had told all them French gals that we had tails. Then they found this ignorant colored soldier, paid him to tie a tail to his ass and run around half-naked, making monkey sound…”

— Charles Fuller, Sergeant Waters, Adolph Caesar, imdb.com

“You don't know how lucky you are being a monkey. Because consciousness is a terrible curse. I think. I feel. I suffer. And all I ask in return is the opportunity to do my work. And they won't allow it... because I raise issues.”

— Charlie Kaufman, Craig Schwartz, John Cusack, imdb.com

“Whillenholly: [Jay and Silent Bob are hiding in the diner] They've got a monkey in there? Sheriff: An ape. Whillenholly: What? Sheriff: An orangutan's a member of the great ape family, it's not a monkey. Whillenholly: Look, who's the Federal Wildlife Marshal here, me or you? That's what I thought.”

— Kevin Smith, Federal Wildlife Marshal Willenholly, Will Ferrell, imdb.com

“It may not be my way, but damn if there doesn't go one happy family. All right, gang, let's just shoot some tear gas into the diner, and then when the guys come out with the monkey, we'll...Fuckbeans. That was them, wasn't it?”

— Kevin Smith, Federal Wildlife Marshal Willenholly, Will Ferrell, imdb.com

“Captain O'Hagan: What's the significance of this John Chimpo fella? Foster: You know those really cheap Japanese cartoons? No? This is basically a cheaper, Afghani knockoff. It's this monkey that basically travels around the world, doing nasty things. His butler tries to keep him in line, but, uh...…”

— Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin Heffernan, Paul Soter, Erik Stolhanske, Mac, Steve Lemme, imdb.com

“All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school!”

— J. Stewart Burns, Guenter, Tress MacNeille, imdb.com

“You give a monkey a stick, inevitably he’ll beat another monkey to death with it.”

— Hawk Ostby, Mark Fergus, Sadavir Errinwright, Shawn Doyle, imdb.com

“Xanthippe Voorhees: You don't have a cell phone? Kimmy Schmidt: Well I had a cell phone, Xan. Obvs. But I lost it. At the zoo. A monkey took it and she wouldn't give it back. Yeah, Xan. The monkey was a woman. Women can be anything these days.”

— Jack Burditt, Robert Carlock, Kimmy Schmidt, Ellie Kemper, imdb.com

“Yeah, don't worry, Jerry. We're right on this guy like stink on a monkey.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com