Quote
Catalog

Quotes tagged ‘Double Entendres’

(23 total)

Q: Why does the bar association code of ethics prevent sex between lawyers and their clients? A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

— Anonymous, paralegaledu.org

Lenore: I like your pull-out couch. Dick Kelly: Yeah? Well I got news for you, that’s the only thing that’s gonna be pulling out tonight.

— John Phillips, Lenore, Aubrey Plaza, imdb.com

By night's end, I predict me and her will interface.

— John Hughes, Geek 'Farmer Ted', Anthony Michael Hall, imdb.com

James Bond: You're marvelously well equipped. Fatima Blush: Thank you, James. So are you.

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, imdb.com

Sir Frederick Gray, Minister of Defence: My God, what's Bond doing? Q: I think he's attempting re-entry, sir.

— Christopher Wood, Q, Desmond Llewelyn, imdb.com

Austin Powers: Your spy car's a Mini? Nigel Powers: It's not the size mate, it's how you use it.

— Mike Myers, Michael McCullers, Austin Powers / Dr. Evil / Goldmember / Fat Bastard, Mike Myers, imdb.com

[the morning after Bond sleeps with May Day] Max Zorin: You slept well? James Bond: A little restless but I got off eventually.

— Richard Maibaum, Michael G. Wilson, James Bond, Roger Moore, imdb.com

James Bond: [in bed with Jones] I was wrong about you. Dr. Christmas Jones: Yeah, how so? James Bond: I thought Christmas only comes once a year.

— Neal Purvis, Robert Wade, Bruce Feirstein, James Bond, Pierce Brosnan, imdb.com

James Bond: Well my dear, I take it you spend quite a lot of time in the saddle. Jenny Flex: Yes, I love an early morning ride. James Bond: Well, I'm an early riser myself.

— Richard Maibaum, Michael G. Wilson, James Bond, Roger Moore, imdb.com

Dr. Holly Goodhead: James? James Bond: I think it may be time to go home. Dr. Holly Goodhead: Take me 'round the world one more time. James Bond: Why not?

— Christopher Wood, James Bond, Roger Moore, imdb.com

Plenty O'Toole: Hi, I'm Plenty. James Bond: [looks at cleavage] But of course you are.

— Richard Maibaum, Tom Mankiewicz, James Bond, Sean Connery, imdb.com

Fiona: Some men just don't like to be driven. Bond: No, some men don't like to be taken for a ride.

— Jack Whittingham, Richard Maibaum, John Hopkins, Kevin McClory, James Bond, Sean Connery, imdb.com

Clark: Oh, I was just smelling—smiling. I was just blouse—browsing. I, uh, heh heh. Well, I guess it just wouldn't... Oh hee hee, it wouldn't be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter than they—HOTTER than they are. Whew. It is warm in here, isn't it? Mary: You have your co…

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, imdb.com

Corinne: What's this I hear about you doing laundry with my sister? Sonny: Did she say we were doing laundry? Because where I come from, it's called 'doing the hibbidy-dibbidy.'

— Tim Herlihy, Steve Franks, Sonny Koufax, Adam Sandler, imdb.com

Vanessa Baxter: [on Outdoor Man's Vlog] Come on down to Outdoor Man and get your husband off your back! And off your front. [winks] Mike Baxter: [turning off webcam] Are you crazy? You know our minister watches this? Vanessa Baxter: Oh please, he has eight kids, he knows what I'm talking about.

— Eben Russell, Vanessa Baxter, Nancy Travis, imdb.com

Nurse: Here's a prescription for some special shampoo and cream for skin irritation. Butt-head: [laughs] She said 'foreskin.' Beavis: Yeah. Foreskin irritation.

— Kristofor Brown, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Stan: You suck, Cartman! If you want to play America vs. Bosnia anymore, you can just play with yourself! Cartman: That's fine! I like playing with myself! I'll play with myself all day long! [Kenny laughs] Cartman: What?

— Nancy Pimental, Trey Parker, Eric Cartman, Trey Parker, imdb.com

You've got sharp eyes and beautiful…earlobes.

— Richard Malbaum, James Bond, George Lazenby, amazon.com

Simmons: Can I touch it? Crowley: With all due respect, Simmons, I don't think you can handle my rod.

— John Bring, Andrew Dabb, Crowley, Mark Sheppard, imdb.com

Sam: A dentist drilled a guy to death. Dean: You mean the non-sexy kind of drilling, right?

— Eric C. Charmelo, Nicole Snyder, Sam Winchester, Jared Padalecki, imdb.com

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