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Royal Pains Quotes

“Differences are always easier to settle over a good meal.”
— Hank Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: TB or Not TB
Tagged: differences, Easy, settle, Good, Meal
“1986 called. It wants its shorts back.”
— Evan Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: TB or Not TB
Tagged: Diss, Shorts, vintage
“I think it's cute that we had our first fight before our first date.”
— Jill Casey, Royal Pains, Season 1: Strategic Planning
Tagged: Cute, Date, first fight
“I know you love your son, but you need to stop fixating on his destiny and start worrying about his life, because he can't be president if he's dead.”
— Hank Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: Strategic Planning
Tagged: Love, Son, Parenthood, Destiny, Life, dead, President
“Honestly, it smells so bad... It smells like a moose had sex with a bucket of Chinese food in here, like musty... and you kind of look like Jesus and Patrick Dempsey had a child, and that child grew older and then got really sick.”
— Evan Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Smells, Bad, Simile Examples, jesus, Patrick Dempsey, Child
“Why would I want to spend tonight partying with a bunch of people whose biggest problems revolve around whether or not to send their Yorkshire terriers to therapy, huh? Give me one decent reason.”
— Hank Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: party, People, Problems, therapy, Yorkshire terrier
“Evan Lawson: What's my favorite sport, Hank?

Hank Lawson: Extreme social climbing?”
— Hank Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Sport, Favorite, social climbing, Extreme, Sassy
“Hank Lawson: Yeah, and all month I've been saying 'No way.'

Evan Lawson: I thought you meant no way like 'No WAY!'

Hank Lawson: I haven't meant it that way since I was ten.”
— Hank Lawson, Royal Pains, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: month, No way, Meaning, Confusion
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