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Happy Days Quotes

“Richie: We played chess.

Fonzie: You played with her chest?”
— Richie Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: All the Way
Tagged: Chess, chest, Double Entendre
“Potsie: We didn't get the job, I know it.

Ralph: You'd better be wrong. I already spent the money we didn't earn from the last job we didn't get.”
— Ralph Malph, Happy Days, Season 2: Fonzie Joins the Band
Tagged: Money, Gigs, Bands
“Ralph: With a divorcée, all you gotta do is establish a relationship.

Richie: With a glass of water?

Ralph: It's a start, Rich, it's a start. It gets you inside the house. Then, you charm your way into her private quarters. From there, you're just one subtle move away from paradise.

Richie: You go from a glass of water to paradise?”
— Ralph Malph, Happy Days, Season 2: Get a Job
Tagged: divorcée, seduction, Paradise
“My mind's not suspicious, just dirty.”
— Ralph Malph, Happy Days, Season 2: Goin' to Chicago
Tagged: suspicious mind, Dirty Mind
“Hey Rich, I think the man in the Henry J is hungry; he just threw a menu at me!”
— Trudy, Happy Days, Season 2: Richie Moves Out
Tagged: Hunger, Waitress, Drive-in Restaurants
“Richie: I'm gonna interview Howdy Doody.

Potsie: How are you gonna do that?

Richie: I'm gonna pull a few strings.”
— Potsie, Happy Days, Season 2: The Howdy Doody Show
Tagged: Howdy Doody, Puppet
“Richie: Burglar, meet my friends, Ralph and Potsie.

Burglar: You need to widen your circle of acquaintances. These are the most useless friends I've ever seen.”
— Richie Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 2: The Cunningham Caper
Tagged: Burglars, Weak Friends
“Richie: What's your idea of the perfect girl, Fonzie?

Fonzie: 45-22-34... with her own Harley.”
— Fonzie, Happy Days, Season 2: Open House
Tagged: perfect girl, Harley
“Richie: I don't know that much about Hamlet, Fonzie, but I'll teach you everything I know.

Fonzie: Go.

Richie: All right.”
— Richie Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 2: A Star Is Bored
Tagged: Hamlet
“Joanie: Boy, I wish the man would finish fixing our TV set.

Marion: Well, he promised to get our picture tube back in seven to ten days.

Joanie: Yeah, but I'm not gonna last that long. I'll go stir-crazy.

Howard: Do what you did before we had television.

Joanie: I sat around wishing we had a TV.”
— Joanie, Happy Days, Season 2: Big Money
Tagged: TV, TV Repair, Stir-crazy
“Richie: She said she'd do something desperate.

Ralph: How desperate can you get in a ladies' room?

Richie: Do you know what's in a ladies' room?

Ralph: No, do you?”
— Richie Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 2: Who's Sorry Now?
Tagged: Desperate, ladies' room
“Richie: Fonzie, did your family ever have a second car?

Fonzie: Nope. But we got four motorcycles. We even got a sidecar for my grandma.”
— Fonzie, Happy Days, Season 2: Richie's Car
Tagged: Family Car, Motorcycles
“Fonzie: Like I always say, you live fast, you die young, you leave a good-looking corpse.

Potsie: Hey, that's cool.

Richie: Nick Romano said that in Knock on Any Door.

Fonzie: I think I said it better.”
— Fonzie, Happy Days, Season 1: Be the First on Your Block
Tagged: Live Fast Die Young, Nick Romano, Knock on Any Door
“This girl's got potential. I took her to the drive-in the other night, and she's still talking to me.”
— Potsie, Happy Days, Season 2: Richie Moves Out
Tagged: Second Date
“Marion: How was the Junior Chipmunk meeting, dear?

Joanie: It was good. Barbara Jo Allen ate a fly.

Howard: Well, with beef at 68 cents a pound, I can't blame her.”
— Marion Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: Great Expectations
Tagged: Junior Chipmunk, Cost of Beef
“Marion: Your father once even sent me a five-pound box of candy on Valentine's Day anonymously. He was a devil.

Howard: I never ever sent you a five-pound box of candy.

Marion: You didn't?

Howard: No, I didn't.

Marion: Then I must have married the wrong man.”
— Marion Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: In the Name of Love
Tagged: valentine's day, candy, Mistaken Identity
“Howard: What are you going to wear to Ralph's costume party?

Richie: I haven't decided yet.

Marion: How about something like Donald Duck?

Richie: Oh, Mom!

Marion: What's wrong with Donald Duck?

Joanie: Mom, it's hard to neck with a beak.”
— Howard Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: Because She's There
Tagged: Donald Duck, Costume Party
“What's the world coming to when you can't bribe your best friend?”
— Potsie, Happy Days, Season 1: Because She's There
Tagged: Bribery, BFF
“Richard, there is one thing that women like men to do. It's what they call 'a romantic gesture.' We men call it 'eating crow.'”
— Howard Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: Breaking Up Is Hard to Do
Tagged: romance, Submission
“Marion: What do you plan to do when you get out of school?

Fonzie: Oh, I was thinking I might become a cop.

Marion: That's very admirable.

Fonzie: I mean, it's the only job I know where they pay you to drive a motorcycle.”
— Fonzie, Happy Days, Season 1: Fonzie Drops In
Tagged: Cops, Career, Motorcycles
“Richie: We played chess.

Fonzie: You played with her chest?”
— Richie Cunningham, Happy Days, Season 1: All the Way
Tagged: Chess, chest
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