pettyfucker Quotes

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We had one girl in our high school, she was 13/14 when these two events happened but if you mention her to anybody aged 18-25 they know who she is.

First - She let a dog lick her out on a park bench. It was talked about for months until a girl in my year group videoed herself being fingered on a school laptop and an IT technician found it. Then everyone kind of forgot/treated it as a myth.

Second - Big Christmas party at one of the most popular guys house in my year group. His parents were rich as fuck and lived in the 'posh' part of the town so obviously his house was the best place to have a party because it was huge. He invited so many people that it just ended up being a massive stereotypical American party you see in the movies. Everyone was drunk as fuck. This girl decides she's in love with the guy who hosted the party and wants to get his attention. So she goes to his Christmas tree, shouts 'watch this!', and shoves one of his mum's expensive as fuck Christmas baubles up her vagina.

Silence. The party host just covered his mouth and whispered 'not the fucking Harrods bauble'. Even more silence. Then the bauble broke.

Inside her vagina.

It was the best and worst Christmas party I've ever been to. None of the staff were ever informed what happened (to our knowledge) but the lad who hosted the party had to put up with everyone asking our form tutors if we could take a school trip to Harrods for months.

November 16, 2016