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Peter Mehlman Quotes
Occupations: | Screenwriter |
Total quotes: 91
Peter Mehlman
BirthnameOccupations: Screenwriter
Total quotes: 91
“George: Why do they make the condom packets so hard to open?
Jerry: Probably to give the woman a chance to change her mind.”
Jerry: Probably to give the woman a chance to change her mind.”
Tagged:
condoms, Abstinence
“This thing is like an onion. The more layers you peel, the more it stinks.”
Tagged:
Conspiracy, Onions
“Do the medical journals mention anything about standing in a pool of someone else's urine?”
Tagged:
Public Urination, Medical Journals
“I think you're both mentally ill. And by the way...they're real, and they're spectacular.”
Tagged:
Breast Implants, Mental Illness
“You see, this is what I do with women. I start out too strong, now I have to become real, that's when it all falls apart. What good is real? They don't want real, they want funny.”
Tagged:
Dating, Self-Consciousness
“You dipped the chip. You took a bite. And you dipped again. That's like putting your whole mouth right in the dip! From now on, when you take a chip—just take one dip and end it.”
Tagged:
Double Dipping, disease
“You know, everybody listens to the Chinese. I mean, look at the fortune cookie. You couldn't get away with that in any other restaurant.”
Tagged:
Chinese People, Fortune Cookies
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