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Lorelai Gilmore Quotes

Total quotes: 55
“Hey, I have a New Year's resolution for you: Become more cynical and self-absorbed.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 2: The Bracebridge Dinner
Tagged: New Year's Resolution, Cynical, Self-Absorbed
“You weren't wearing your 'hot and wealthy' sandwich board were you, Mom?”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 5: A Messenger, Nothing More
Tagged: hot and wealthy, sandwich board
“Oh! Dinner with Rory! How delightful! Well, spit-spot. Alert the corgis.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 6: Friday Night's Alright for Fighting
Tagged: Welsh Corgis, Dinner, Delightful
“You can't watch Willy Wonka without massive amounts of junk food.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 1: Kiss and Tell
Tagged: Junk Food, Willy Wonka
“If you're going to throw your life away, he'd better have a motorcycle.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Life, Love, Bad Boy
“There's plenty to do tonight that we can be mortified about tomorrow.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Drinking, Going Out, Partying
“My mother is fast asleep in my bed, clutching my Hello Kitty pillow, and yes, I have pictures.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 5: Wedding Bell Blues
Tagged: hello kitty, mother, Sleeping, Pictures
“Oh yes, it was beautiful in there. We should commemorate it with an oil painting or a severed head or something.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 1: Christopher Returns
Tagged: Beautiful, oil painting, severed head
“So not only did you go to a cop-raided party, but you started the raid? [Then she proceeds to sing, 'Did You Ever Know That You're My Hero?']”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 3: Say Goodnight, Gracie
Tagged: Cops, party, did you ever know that you're my hero?
“I need caffeine. Whatever form you've got, I haven't had any all day. I'll drink it, shoot it, eat it, snort it, whatever form it's in, gimme.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 5: Women Of Questionable Morals
Tagged: Caffeine, Coffee
“When I have made one zillion dollars from my rocket gum invention you will eat those words! Or rather you will chew those words and blow a bubble with them.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 7: The Long Morrow
Tagged: inventions, Patents, rocket gum
“Why is she taking our coats and pouring us drinks? Did you win her in a poker game?”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 7: Lorelai's First Cotillion
Tagged: maid, poker game
“Seventy-five thousand dollars? Oh my God, that’s like 150 pairs of Jimmy Choos.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 3: Happy Birthday, Baby
Tagged: Jimmy Choo
“Hey, tomorrow, if you have time, I'm planning on despising everyone who says 'Hey, how's it going?'”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 1: Star-Crossed Lovers and Other Strangers
Tagged: How's it going?, despise
“There have been very few moments in my life where I have actually wished I had one of those enormous crème pies you can just smash in somebody's face. But this is definitely one of them.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 2: Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy
Tagged: Pie, pie throwing
“Cheeseburger, onion rings, and a list of people who killed their parents and got away with it. I’m looking for heroes.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 4: An Affair to Remember
Tagged: cheeseburger, onion rings, Parricide, Heroes
“I love pudding. I worship it. I have a bowl up on the mantel at home with the Virgin Mary, a glass of wine, and a dollar bill next to it.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 1: Rory's Birthday Parties
Tagged: Pudding, Wine, worship, virgin mary
“We need you to look at Kirk's butt. He ran into some rose bushes, and he's got some thorns stuck in it, and I thought of you.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 5: Say Goodbye to Daisy Miller
Tagged: butt, thorn bushes
“Don't let his family see you. Spiders are vindictive. And this was a really big spider. I think it had a gun.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 3: That'll Do, Pig
Tagged: Family, Spiders, Vindictive, Gun
“My life stinks. Hey, let’s look into each other’s eyes and say 'I wish I were you' at exactly the same time — maybe we’ll pull a 'Freaky Friday.'”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 3: Haunted Leg
Tagged: life stinks, Freaky Friday
“I stop drinking coffee, I stop doing the standing and the walking and the words-putting-into-sentence doing.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: Coffee, humor, Tired
“It feels… right. Such a long time getting here… sometimes it’s just a journey, you know?”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Coffee, Love For Coffee
“I thought I knew exactly what I wanted, where I was going, what I was doing and why I was doing. But lately, things seem hazier.”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: confusing, Wants, Needs
“It's all any of us wants, to find a nice person to hang out with until we drop dead. Not a lot to ask!”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Love, Relationships, Marriage
“This is America, where we unapologetically bastardize other countries' cultures in a gross quest for moral and military supremacy.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: America, Politics, humor, Culture
“He’s like a superhero, but his power is that you can’t remember him no matter how much time you spend with him. Kind of like every Marvel movie ever.”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Gilmore Girls, T.V Quotes, Netflix, A Year In The Life
“It's my life, Rory. I went through all this effort for many, many years making sure people only knew what I wanted them to know, and now you're going to lay it all out in a book?”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Truth, Honesty, Parents
“I sat down and it just came out. Flew out. It's like this story has been sitting in my brain for years, taking up space.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Once Upon a Time, Season 4: Fall
Tagged: Writing, Finding Your Voice, inspiration
“Life’s been pretty good to you. It was your turn for a few curveballs. Peeks and valley’s, kid.”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Tough Life, Challenges
“If it was physically possible to make love to a hot beverage, this would be the one.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: Coffee, Love, humor
“As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I'm totally flexible.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Control, Control Freak, Flexibility
“Did anyone ever think that maybe Sylvia Plath wasn't crazy, she was just cold?”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Sylvia Plath
“I don't like problems. I avoid them when I can and I don't like people pointing them out to me.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, Problems, Avoiding Problems
“I would like a cheeseburger, with a side of cheeseburger, and see if they can make me a cheeseburger smoothie.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: food, humor, Hunger
“'Hello' is the appropriate way to indicate you're open to a social engagement. Unless, however, you're approaching a weasel. Then I believe the proper signal is just to offer him your hindquarters.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: humor, socializing, Dating
“Everything in my life has something to do with coffee. I believe in a former life, I was coffee.”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Coffee, Love For Coffee
“When I think of blistering thirty-degree burns, I also think of my mother.”
— Lorelai Gilmore,
Tagged: Tough Life, Challenges
“'My God, I hate her.'

'Me too.'

'You have no idea who I'm talking about.'

'Solidarity.'”
— Rory Gilmore, Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls
Tagged: Friendship, Best Friends, Friends
“He called me ‘hot plates.’ He sooooo likes me.”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 5: Written in the Stars
Tagged: compliments
“And if he says no, just ask him louder. It’s part of the game!”
— Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Season 3: A Tale of Poes and Fire
Tagged: Game, no, louder
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