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John Roberts Quotes

Total quotes: 13
“You're a hurtful slut, Bob!”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 2: Dr. Yap
Tagged: Hurtful Slut, Slut, Slut-shaming
“You were right, Bob. I needed to let my baby birds fly. My bratty little baby birds fly with their crappy little wings. Sometimes you gotta push 'em out the window.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 2: Synchronized Swimming
Tagged: Alliteration, Baby Birds, Failure to Launch
“Linda: Mort, Teddy, what are you doing right now?


Mort: Adjusting myself without anyone noticing.



Teddy: Watching Mort adjust himself.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 4: Fort Night
Tagged: Adjusting Oneself, watching someone adjust themselves
“I had the video game company take your game away because I love you. It's like the time you took away the credit card from me when I was ordering all those porcelain babies.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 2: Burgerboss
Tagged: Video Games, Addiction, Tough Love, Credit Card
“Rich people run funny. Must be all the money in their pockets. Or their big, rich, golden wieners. Eh, it's probably their wieners.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 4: Ambergris
Tagged: Rich People, Golden Wieners, Money
“I should write a parenting book. Call it, ‘Hey You, I Saw That! Put It Back!’”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 4: The Kids Run Away
Tagged: Parenting Books, Parenting
“It was a time in Japan when the evil monsters would attack the nice little villages for no good reason. And the only force in all of Japan who could stop them are...Hawk & Chick!”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 5: Hawk & Chick
Tagged: Japanese Monsters, Japan, Evil
“Louise, you do not want that flu bug. I had it and it gave me weird fever dreams. I dreamt I was in a book club with my cousin Vanessa, but she was a werewolf.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 7: Flu-ouise
Tagged: Flu, Fever Dreams, nightmares, Werewolves
“Two people, together forever. Security in life! And someone to love ya! Instead of being all alone, such a lonely existence. I'd kill myself!”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: My Fuzzy Valentine
Tagged: Security, Loneliness, Commitment, Suicide, Being Alone, Single Life Sucks
“Linda: [worried] They're not here! I got Tina's diary, let's see if it says anything. [reads diary] Dear Diary, tonight we're sneaking into the dangerous taffy factory. Also, if boys had uteruses they'd be called duderuses.'


Bob: Ha, 'duderuses.'”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 2: The Belchies
Tagged: Duderuses, Diary, dangerous, Portmanteus
“Wine helps me drink.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 4: A River Runs Through Bob
Tagged: Wine, Drinking
“I wanna take her stupid neck and wring it!”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 5: Late Afternoon in the Garden of Bob and Louise
Tagged: Threats, Strangulation, Wanting To Kill People, Desire to Murder
“Teddy: You know that boat that I've been fixing up?


Linda: Yoooou've mentioned it.



Teddy: Well, I finally got her shipshape, and I thought it'd be fun to take you all out.



Louise: Kill us?



Teddy: No, take you out for a boat ride.”
— Linda Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 7: Sea Me Now
Tagged: Threats, invitations, boats
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