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Hugh Laurie Quotes

Total quotes: 80
“You took a chance, you did something great. You were wrong, but it was still great. You should feel great that it was great. You should feel like crap that it was wrong.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: DNR
Tagged: Chance, Great, Wrong, Crap, Feelings
“Dr. Eric Foreman: I think your argument is specious.

Dr. Gregory House: I think your tie is ugly.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Occam's Razor
Tagged: argument, Specious, Sassy, Diss, ugly, Insult
“It's normal to be screwed up, but it's really screwed up to romanticize it.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 8: Parents
Tagged: normalcy, Romanticism, Idealism
“Dr. James Wilson: That smugness of yours really is an attractive quality.

Dr. Gregory House: Thank you. It was either that or get my hair highlighted. Smugness is easier to maintain.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Occam's Razor
Tagged: Smug, sarcastic, Attractive, Quality, Sassy, Maintain, hair
“We were both wrong, not equally wrong. You were at least six more wronger than me.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 4: Frozen
Tagged: humor, Being wrong
“Dr. Allison Cameron: Men should grow up.

Dr. Gregory House: Yeah, and dogs should stop licking themselves. It's not gonna happen.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Occam's Razor
Tagged: Men, Dogs, habits, Sassy, sarcastic, Grow Up
“Dr. Robert Chase: The hematoma caused the coma.

Dr. Gregory House: That's a catchy diagnosis. You could dance to that.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Mob Rules
Tagged: Coma, catchy, Rhyme, Dancing, Diagnosis
“I am not warm and fuzzy and you are basically a stuffed animal made by grandma.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Role Model
Tagged: Warm, fuzzy, stuffed animal, Metaphor Examples, Grandma, Contrast
“Love and happiness are nothing but distractions.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 7: Recession Proof
Tagged: Love, Happiness, Life, Distractions, Reality
“There's no 'I' in team. There's a 'me' though, if you jumble it up.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: DNR
Tagged: Teamwork, Collaboration, Cooperation, humor, Sarcasm
“Everything is conditional. We just don't know what the conditions are.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 3: Son of Coma Guy
Tagged: Reality, Perception, Understanding The Environment, strategy, Planning
“You talk to God, you're religious; God talks to you, you're psychotic.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 2: House vs. God
Tagged: Religion, God, Sanity, Insanity
“Oxygen is so important during those prepubescent years, don't you think?”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Oxygen, sarcastic, Sassy, Important, Prepubescent
“It is in the nature of medicine, that you are gonna screw up. You are gonna kill someone. If you can't handle that reality, pick another profession or finish medical school and teach.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Three Stories
Tagged: Medicine, Death, Dying Art, screw up, Reality, medical school, Teaching
“See, children grow up thinking the adult world is ordered, rational, fit for purpose. It's crap. Becoming a man is realizing, that it's all rotten. Realizing how to celebrate that rottenness, that's freedom.”
— Richard Onslow Roper, The Night Manager, Season 1: Episode 3
Tagged: Children, Childhood Innocence, adult world, Crap, Rotten, Celebrate, Freedom
“Patient: Times changes everything.

House: That's what people say. It's not true. Doing things changes things. Not doing things leaves things exactly as they were.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 3: One Day, One Room
Tagged: Time, Change, Taking Action, Self-Direction
“It's a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies. The only variable is about what.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Three Stories
Tagged: Truth, Lies, Honesty, Dishonesty, The Human Condition, lying
“There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is - in fact - a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Occam's Razor
Tagged: Love, Hate, emotions, humor
“When we don't find the logical answer, we settle for a stupid one. Ritual is what happens when we run out of rational.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 7: Small Sacrifices
Tagged: Ritual, Rational, Rationality, Logic, Thinking, stupidity, Intelligence, Questioning
“How come God gets credit whenever something good happens? Where was he when her heart stopped?”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 3: Human Error
Tagged: God, Religion, Credit
“I take risks, sometimes patients die. But not taking risks causes more patients to die, so I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Detox
Tagged: Patients, Dying, Medicine, Taking Risks
“Dr. Allison Cameron: Needle in a haystack.

Dr. Gregory House: It's worse than that. We don't even know it's a needle we're looking for.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Maternity
Tagged: Needle in a haystack, Metaphor Examples, Worse
“[someone is groaning in the restroom stall] 

Good lord! Are you having a bowel movement or a baby?”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Kids
Tagged: Gross, Bowel Movement, Baby, bathroom, Pain
“You trusted me to bring you to this moment. Nothing worthwhile is ever done through thinking alone. At some point, you have to act.”
— Eldon Chance, Chance, Season 2: Treasures in Jars of Clay
Tagged: act
“Just because you don't know what the right answer is, maybe there's even no way you could know what the right answer is doesn't make your answer right or even okay. It's much simpler than that. It's just plain wrong.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Three Stories
Tagged: Right, Answer, Okay, simpler, Wrong
“War is a spectator's sport. We are emperors of Rome, Andrew. Blood and steel, the only elements that ever meant anything.”
— Richard Onslow Roper, The Night Manager, Season 1: Episode 5
Tagged: War, Spectator's sport, Emperors, Blood, Steel, elements
“Billie: Ryan, you ready to do this? 

Ryan: With every fiber of my being. No.”
— Ryan Clark, Avenue 5, Season 1: Wait a Minute, Then Who Was That on the Ladder?
Tagged: Nervous, Ready, Fiber of my being
“If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 4: The Right Stuff
Tagged: Religion, Religious People, Reason, Intellect
“The problem is, the world doesn't work that way just because you want it to.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Heavy
Tagged: World, Life, Truth
“Jobs are not being destroyed they are being relocated. The fact that you see that as inherently bad means that you are an irrational patriot. To put it another way: a patriot.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 8: Risky Business
Tagged: Jobs, Patriotism, Patriotic, Blind Patriotism
“Lies are like children: they're hard work, but it's worth it because the future depends on them.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 4: It's a Wonderful Lie
Tagged: Lies, lying, Children, The future, humor, Sarcasm
“You want to know how two chemicals interact, do you ask them? No, they're going to lie through their lying little teeth. Throw them in a beaker and apply heat.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Cursed
Tagged: humor, Sarcasm, Honesty, lying, Dishonesty, Lies, Telling The Truth, pressure, Mankind, The Human Condition
“Figuring out who people are takes time. And it takes twice as much time if they're trying to impress you.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 6: Private Lives
Tagged: People, Human Nature, Personality
“If you wanted fair, you chose the wrong job, the wrong profession, the wrong species.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 4: Ugly
Tagged: fair, Human Condition, Mankind
“You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn't perfect.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Love Hurts
Tagged: Delusion, Perfect, fix everything
“Ramona: Hi. I'm having vaginal pain.

Dr. Gregory House: Pleasure to meet you.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Love Hurts
Tagged: Vaginal Pain, Introductions, Pleasure, Meeting Someone
“Dr. James Wilson: Hey, you have to treat this like a regular case. Be yourself: cold, uncaring, distant.

Dr. Gregory House: Please, don't put me on a pedestal.”
— Dr. Gregory House, House, Season 1: Honeymoon
Tagged: regular case, cold, normal, uncaring, distant, Sassy, Sarcastic Depression, Pedestal
“I get anxious about everything. I just can't stop thinking about things all the time. And here's the really destructive part -- it's always retrospective. I waste time thinking of what I should have said or done.”
— Hugh Laurie, TOP 25 QUOTES BY HUGH LAURIE(of 98) | A-Z Quotes
Tagged: Anxiety, Anxious, Overthinking, H4D-14
“Love is a word. A sound. Its association with a particular feeling is arbitrary, unmeasurable, and ultimately meaningless.”
— Hugh Laurie, The Gun Seller
Tagged: Love, meaningless, Feelings
“Don’t go to Casablanca expecting it to be like the film. In fact, if you’re not too busy, and your schedule allows it, don’t go to Casablanca at all.”
— Hugh Laurie, The Gun Seller
Tagged: casablanca, Movies, travel
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