1. People
    2.  › 
  2. Heather Havrilesky

Heather Havrilesky Quotes

Total quotes: 28
“I am here, trying. I am a person who tries. I do what I fucking can. It's okay to just try.”
— Heather Havrilesky, How to Be a Person in the World
Tagged: How To Be A Person, We Are All Just Trying Out Here
“Here’s the truth about energy: Most people don’t have much of it.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I Will Never Be Who I Want to Be’
Tagged: Moving On, Life, life advice, Self-improvement, Inspirational
“Following your heart means abandoning your exhausting attempts to 'fix' things using your mind.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I’m Lazy, Reckless, and Addicted to Social Media. Help!’
Tagged: Advice, Follow Your Heart
“Your weaknesses are more beautiful than you think. Let them surprise you.”
— Heather Havrilesky, The Cut, ‘Am I Too Weird and Contradictory to Find Love?’
Tagged: Weakness, Love, contradictory, Weird
“You can relish your own intensity without expecting compliance and perfect understanding. It’s not all or nothing.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I’m 17 and No One Understands Me!’
Tagged: Misunderstood, Intensity
“You can’t invest in what random unproven friends and acquaintances think of you. It’s a massive, self-destructive waste of time. Do exactly what you want at all times without managing their experience of you.”
— Heather Havrilesky, My Ex-Best Friend Is Talking Trash About Me to Other People!
Tagged: Friendship
“See how I was thinking about a smell? That’s how you know I’m a real artist and not some fucking hack who writes light verse for The New Yorker.”
— Heather Havrilesky, How to Write
Tagged: How to be a writer, humor
“The question of your worthiness is not on the table at all. You know what you want. Embrace that and stand up for it without huffing the spray paint that everyone else is huffing.”
— Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly: He Wanted an Open Relationship. Why Wasn’t I Enough?
Tagged: Enough, Relationships, Love, How to be good at love, The way forward
“Building a life with another human being means working with what you have.”
— Heather Havrilesky, I Can’t Stop Being Angry at My Boyfriend for Moving Away
Tagged: Ask Polly, Advice, Love, Love Advice, Relationship Advice, Long Distance Relationships
“All you have to be is a human being. That’s success. When you’re a human being, life feels satisfying.”
— Heather Havrilesky, I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life
Tagged: Shame, Starting Over
“We all have to set our terrors and our scars and our disappointments and our heartbreaks aside and move forward with an open heart.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘Men Always Disappoint Me!’
Tagged: Men, Disappointment, Hope, Love
“I think you’re looking for a way to live a more genuine, authentic life. In order to do that, you need to learn how to say no without immediately apologizing for yourself.”
— Heather Havrilesky, I Love My Friends, But I Hate Making Plans to See Them!
Tagged: Authenticity, Honesty, Being a Good Friend, Self-Care
“Sometimes you spend one day feeling wretched and then the next day, you feel miraculously better. It’s like you burned off something toxic by facing a dark truth about yourself. You took your humbling.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘Why Do My Friendships Always Fade Away?’
Tagged: Friendships
““HEY IS THERE A CHECK ON THE WAY FINALLY? LOL! THIS BIG GUY WITH A BASEBALL BAT AT MY FRONT DOOR WANTS TO KNOW! OMG MY KNEES! XXXOOO””
— Heather Havrilesky, How to Write
Tagged: How to be a writer, humor, Freelance, Money
“So that’s a long-term personal goal for you: Find the freaks and the overenthusiastic puppies. Treat them well. Overshare with oversharers.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I Can’t Stop Oversharing!’
Tagged: Oversharing, Friendship
“We are committed to each other, loyal to each other, and very tolerant of each other, in spite of a lot of rocky shared history.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘My Friendships Make Me Sad’
Tagged: Friendships, Lonely, Being Lonely, Sad, Isolating, Being The Bad Friend
“You have to dig through the soil and hit the gravel layers and then blast through the granite. None of these things are related to your child at all.”
— Heather Havrilesky, 'My Kid Is Nonbinary, and I Can’t Get Over It’
Tagged: Nonbinary, Gender Identity, Mourning, Loss, Parenting
“You are free. You are real. You are blameless. You are whole. You can want things. There is no moral to this story.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I Don’t Trust My Friends!’
Tagged: Trust, Friendship, Self-Worth
“Forgive yourself, every single minute of every day. Wake up in the morning and forgive yourself.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I’m Miserable and I’m Taking It Out on My Husband’
Tagged: Self-Love, Self-Worth, forgiveness
“It’s time for you to stop seeing yourself as worthless, every single day. You have to start accepting yourself and cherishing your emotional experience. You have to dare to believe that your feelings matter, and you matter.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘I’m Obsessed With a Woman Who Doesn’t Want Me’
Tagged: Dating and Relationships, Obsession
“Egalitarian parenting means two people share all of the responsibilities of parenting equally. That means there is no default parent. That also means that one parent is not assumed to be the correct parent for certain tasks based on their gender.”
— Heather Havrilesky, Why Do New Mothers Hate Their Husbands?
Tagged: Parenthood
“Needing all of these things doesn’t make you a whiny loser. You need a lot. I do, too. There’s no value judgment to be made about that. It’s not your fault. That’s WHO YOU ARE. You are a lot, and you need a lot. It’s time to start admitting that to yourself.”
— Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly: ‘I Have Everything I’ve Ever Wanted But I’m Still Unhappy’
Tagged: Feelings, emotions
“If you’re going to date men, you’re going to be disappointed.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘Men Always Disappoint Me!’
Tagged: Men
“Be a question mark. Take up space, own your lost, confused feelings, and forget your slideshow and your prepared comments. Listen instead. Own where you are, and then make more room for where other people are. When you’re undecided and wishy-washy, that’s a very good time to recede into the background slightly and train your focus on others.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘How Do I Decide What to Do With My Life?’
Tagged: Question Mark, Uncertainty
“Claiming that you’re ‘not enough’ for someone who wants an open relationship is like saying that a socket wrench is not enough for a freshwater trout. The two things are completely unrelated to each other. That’s why arguing ‘I should be enough for you!’ does nothing. What you should say is: I will be enough for the right person.”
— Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly: He Wanted an Open Relationship. Why Wasn’t I Enough?
Tagged: Enough, Relationships, Love, How to be good at love, The way forward
“It’s okay to feel sad about something that’s broken, in other words, but that doesn’t mean you’re the one who has to fix it. You need to really experience this sadness and welcome it into your life and ask it to show you things. You need this sadness and longing to show you how to be a person with rights. You need this sadness so you can start to build a religion of your own, one that makes you feel strong, one that gives up on apologies as a means of control, one that finally abandons this old, dusty view of yourself that your family planted in your brain.”
— Heather Havrilesky, ‘My Family Isn’t Speaking to Me and I’m Miserable Over It!’
Tagged: Sadness, Religion, Longing
“Escapists tend to focus on one thing that takes up their entire world, whether it’s love, money, status, alcohol, or even travel. It can be a good thing or a bad thing. The point is to avoid living in reality and weathering the ups and downs of everyday life. The point is to have a goal and keep pushing for that goal. “This will fix everything,” you say. “This is the answer to all of my prayers.””
— Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly: ‘How Do I Get the Love of My Life to Take a Leap With Me?’
Tagged: Escapists, Addictions, Perfectionism
“A big part of our jobs, as mature adult human beings, is figuring out who we are and what we value WITHOUT falling back on a million and one inaccurate and clumsy stories told by other people who know us about as well as a fucking squirrel knows the moon. The squirrel might say, “The moon is on fire, dude! Look, it’s lighting up the whole night! That’s white-hot fire, my friend!” And even though we have literally visited the moon (because we are experienced astronauts!) we listen to the squirrel and we tell ourselves, “You freak, you blocked all of that white-hot fire from your memory, I guess because you’re just someone who hates heat.” “Yeah, you can’t stand the heat, you’re always getting out of the kitchen just when things get fun,” the squirrel chimes in, then swigs his bourbon and trips over the throw rug and breaks one of your best highball glasses and it takes hours to fish the shards of glass out of the piles of stuff all over the floor.”
— Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly: ‘Why Am I So Lazy?’
Tagged: procrastination, habits, Identity, Values
loading next page...