Quote
Catalog

David Mandel

31 quotesFilm Director · United States Of America · Male

David H. Mandel (born 1970) is an executive producer and showrunner of Veep and formerly an executive producer and director of Curb Your Enthusiasm, and one of the producers of the teen-comedy Eurotrip. He was a writer for Seinfeld during its seventh, eighth, and ninth seasons. He is also one of the creators of Clerks: The Animated Series, and he was a writer for Saturday Night Live. He had a brief stint as a host of Dave and Steve's Video Game Explosion, a comedy video game review show that aired late nights on TBS as part of the Burly Bear Network. The show only lasted a few episodes before the entire block was canceled. Mandel is also one of the authors of Star Wars Art: Ralph McQuarrie, a comprehensive collection of Star Wars artwork by Ralph McQuarrie, published in 2016 by Abrams Books. 2Seinfeld episodes Mandel wrote the Seinfeld episode "The Bizarro Jerry", and on the commentary track to the DVD, has stated that this was his favorite Seinfeld of the episodes he wrot

All Sex (2)Lawsuits (2)Abstinence (2)smoking (2)Threats (2)Breakups (2)balls (1)Livelihood (1)Bad Jokes (1)garbage (1)Sleep Deprivation (1)Lawyers (1)Independence (1)Industrialist (1)Greek Mythology (1)

From “The Pool Guy”

Come on! I know you're there, laughing at me. Laughing and lying and laughing.

Laughing lying Paranoia

Ah, you have no idea of the magnitude of this thing. If she is allowed to infiltrate this world, then George Costanza as you know him ceases to exist! You see, right now, I have Relationship George, but there is also Independent George. That's the George you know, the George you grew up with—Movie…

Independence Relationships Coffee Shops Movies

Well you know, all you guys ever do is sit around the coffee shop talking, sit around Jerry's apartment talking. Frankly, I don't know how you can stand it. I’ll see you.

Boredom Jerry Talks Too MUch

This is not good. Worlds are colliding! George is getting upset.

Worlds Collide Getting Upset

You know, uh, she has no female friends! You know that, don'tcha? Something strange about a woman whose friends are all men.

One of the Boys Women with no Female Friends "I Hate Other Women"

There's nothing more pathetic than a grown man who’s afraid of a woman.

Masculinity Grown Man Fear of Women

You're a man's woman. You hate other women, and they hate you.

Misogyny Man's Woman Female Misogyny Women Hating Women

From “The Friars Club”

Oh, I'm percolating, Jerry. I'm telling you, I have never felt so fertile. I'm mossy, Jerry. My brain is mossy. Listen to this idea: a restaurant that serves only peanut butter and jelly.

Percolating Mossy fertile Peanut Butter and Jelly Sleep Deprivation

From “The Bizarro Jerry”

Well, you know what they say, you don't sell the steak, you sell the sizzle.

Sales Advertising Steak

The hands of a man. It's like a creature out of Greek mythology; I mean, she was like part woman, part horrible beast.

Greek Mythology Man Hands

From “The Abstinence”

I'm sorry, Elaine. I always knew that after I became a doctor, I would dump whoever I was with and find someone better. That's the dream of becoming a doctor.

doctors Players Dating

Rugged? The man's a goblin. He's only been exposed to smoke for four days. By the time this case gets to trial, he’ll be nothing more than a shrunken head.

Rugged Goblins smoking Lawsuits Tobacco

This is the most public yet of my many humiliations.

Public Humiliation

Miss Wilkie, your tobacco company has turned this beautiful specimen into a horrible, twisted freak.

smoking Lawyers Lawsuits Freaks Hyperbole

Jerry, my face is my livelihood, my allure...my twinkle! Everything I have I owe to this face.

face Visage Livelihood Vanity

To a woman, sex is like the garbage man. You just take for granted the fact that any time you put some trash out on the street, a guy in a jumpsuit's gonna come along and pick it up. But now, it's like a garbage strike. The bags are piling up in your head. The sidewalk is blocked. Nothing's getting…

Sex Abstinence Trash garbage Garbage Strike

I mean, let's say this is your brain. OK, from what I know about you, your brain consists of two parts: the intellect, represented here, and the part obsessed with sex. Now, granted, you have extracted an astonishing amount from this little scrap. But with no-sex—Louise, this previously useless lump…

Sex Abstinence Brain

From “The Susie”

If she can't find me, she can't break up with me.

Breakups Avoidance Ghosting

I don't think I'll ever be able to forget Susie—ahhh. And most of all, I will never forget that one night. Working late on the catalog. Just the two of us. And we surrendered to temptation. And it was pretty good.

funerals Passion Fables fiction

This is my one chance to make a great entrance! My whole life, I have never made a great entrance!

balls Entrances

& W WM W W & WMWW W& WWW& WWWW WWM WWW W KWW& W K WMW WW MWW MMW WW WW WMW WW& KWM& W K WMW WMWW W MWW W W & WWW WWW& W W WWW KWWW W W WWW W& W W W W W WK W &W W W &W W W W W KW W W W WK WW WW W &W W W W W W KW WK W W W W W &W WWWW W W W WK W W WM&WW W& W W WK &W W K W WW W W WW W W W W W & W W W & W W W WW W W WW W W W WW W W W WK WW W W W& W W WK W W W K K & &W MW WKK K WM WW W W &W WM W KW MW W W W K WW K WW KW& WK W & MW& KM W M& WW& WWK M & K & & & && MW W & & & && K K K W W WW WW & K& K &K && & && &K K && KM W M MK KKK W &W KW W W W WK WW WW WM W W W WW WM WW WW WWK W W W WK W W W KW MW W W W& W W W W W W W W W W W WW & W W WW MW W W &W W W W W W W W W & WW WW W WW W W&W W W K W W W W W W WK W W W W & W W W WW W & &W W W WW KK W W & W WW W W WMW M K &WWW W W W &K W W W WMW K W W W W KWWW W K &WWW W&W M W& KWWW WWW W W WWW W WWMW W W K W M W KW W &WKWW W MW W WK W&MW W W W W W WW KW WKWW W &W W &W WW WW W WKKW WMKW &W W WKWW&WW M& W KM W MW W WW W W W &KW WW W W W W W W W W M W W W W W W W W W W W WM&W &W W WKMW W &W WMWW WWKW W W W M& W W&WW W W W W W W W W&&W WW&W W W W W W WK W MW &MMMMMMMMW&MMWWM&WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWW&&&&MWMMMMMWWM&&&MMMW&& M&KKKK&KKKKKKKKK K&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&K &&&&&&&&&&K MWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW W&&&MMMMMMMMMMK &MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM&&K KMMMMMMMWMWWWW& WWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW WMMMMMMMMM&&K KWWWWWWMMMWWWM&K K&MMMMMMMMMMMMWM WWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW MMMMMMMMMM&K KWWMM& WWWWWWWMKKKKK&K &MMMMMMMMMMMMMW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWK KWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW &&MMMMMM&&&K &M&KK &MMMMMMMMMMMMMW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW M&MMMM& &&&&K MWWM &MMMMMMMMMMMMMW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWW K& WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW &&MM& MWM&K K K&K KMMMMMMMMMMMMMW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWWWWMMWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW K &WMK WWMMK K&MMM&MMMMMM&&W WWWWWWWWWWWWWWW&MWWWWMMWWWWWWWWWWW MWWWWWWM &WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW &M&K &WWWWWW &&&&&&&MMM&&&M WWWWWWWWWWWWWWW&MMWWWMMWWWWWWWWWWW MW W KWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW M& WWWWWWWM K&&&&&&&&&&&&M

: : :

} < * } } *} * * < } * } * } } < * * * * * } } } * * * * < < } * }* } } } }* < < }} * * * } } * * * < < < * } } < < < } } } * * } *} } * * <} * < } * < * } *< } < } * } ** }* } } * < * < < < } * < ** ** } * * } } < * * < * < < *< ~ * < < < ~~ < ~ < < } < < < } ~ ~ ~~ ~ < * < < < * ~ } <* * ~ < < } < ~ < ~ ~ * * ~ ~ * < < } < ~ < < ~ } < < * ~ ** << ~< * }***<<<<<<} } }}***} }********<<} }* } }*<*<*<<<*}} * }} *<<<<<* *< * <<<<<<< }} **<} } } *<<<* }}*****<* } **<*} } ~ } } }**}} }*<*} ******}***<*} **} *<<<<<< *~ <}} }}*}**********<<******}**<<<<<<<} < }**}}*<~~<*}} }******<***<}}<<******<<<<<<<< } } *~ ~<<<<<*} }< ******<<***< ****<*}*<<<<<<<< } }

V o o o j o j Uj j j o V V U U j jj V o U U Vo j j UU oUU UU Vo V UU j U V oVU V Uo V VU VV U j V U V V Vo V V o V j U o oj V o VV o U o U UV j o V o Vj oU U U oV o V V V j j U j j o UU V j U V V V V V oVj jV Vo UVj U V j V o U Uj oV VU V V jV U U U o Vo U jU U o o VU V V V Ujo o V o V o j U o j V V V j U j oV j oj j j o UVUo o V j oo o U VV jV j o U U j VV j oV U VV V U jU j o o U V j j o j j o o o oo U U j U o U U o o o V j U j j U V V o U UU V o VV o j V j o j UU j o j o V o U V o V U V U o U o U V UVooVU Uj oVVoVU V o V UVj jooV UooVUUVo j Uoj jooo jV j VV UVj U Uoj oUUVj joojoU j o jjV VU UVoj jVVj jUUUo oVUUVoj oVUooU j o j UVVVVoV UUVo j jo oUVoj jV V j oU j j oo U Uo jU UUUo U j jj V o jV j j j o VU UVj V UVVVjU o j j jU jV UVj Uoj jU j j jV j U V U j jU Uooj Uj j o

M & K W MK && W & M & W & W &M K &K &W M & W W & K KM K K & M M & W W K W & && & &M WWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWWWWW WWWWK WWWWWW KWMMWW MMMMMW&WMWWWWW WWWWW&WMWWMWW WMK MK & &&&&M MMMMMM&MM&WWWW WW WMWW&WMWWMWW MK KK &&&&& MMMMMM&&M&WWWW KMKKWMWM&WMWWMWW & WWWK KKKK& MMMMMM&KM&&WWW& MKWWWWMMWMWWMWW W&WWW&W K MW&MMMM M&KMWWW WW&WWMMWMWWMWW WWWWWWM KKKKK &W&MMMM &&KMW& MWWMMMW&&MMWWMWW WWWKMW KK &W&MMMM &&KMWKWWWWWWW&&MMMWMWWW KWW& K KW&MMWW &MK& WMKMKWMMWMWWW MW& K&& K KWMMWWW &M&MM KK&WMWWWWWW KWWKK K KKK KWMMWWW &MK&W W W&MWWMWWW MWWWK KK & KK KWMMMWWK&MK&W WWMKMMWWMWWW WWWWK KM &WMMWWW&&MKM &WWMMMMWWWWWW WWWWWW KMW &WMMMWW&MW& MW WWWMMWWWWWW WWWWWW& K K KMWK &W&M&WWM&M& WMMWWWWWW MKWWWK KMM &WMM&MWWWW WMWWWWWW WWW &W MWWWWWWK WWWWWWWW WWM MKK & MWWWWWWW & WWM

: : : : . , , : :: , , : : , . : : : : : , , : , : .: : : : . , . . . . : ,: :: . . ... ,::. . . : . ,,,..,. . . , : .,..,.. : . . ..., : . .. : :. ,,,. . : ,. : : : : . .: . . : , . . , : . . . : ..... .,,, . . : ,:. . .. . , :. :, :,. :. : ,, , : . : , , . : ,,:: . . . : , : : :

< * << ~~~~~~*~<<~ * <~ ~} ~ <~~ *}~} <*< } *}* ~ * } * * } ~ * * } *} ~ *}~ < * } < < *** } } ~} * } * } * <}< } } }< * < *} } < ~< } ~ * ~ << } <*~ < }< < ** } ~ < < ***< <<* } ~ }}}<< ****<*<}}} }**} }}}<*~*<*}<*} *<<<*< **<<****}~ ~~***}*~ }} }< *** ~* }* ~ < ~} <* } } } < ~ ~~ } ~ ~ } ~ ~ * ~ ~ ~ * < } ~ ~<*~~ ~ * <<~} <~<}} * } * ~ <*< } ~~< }~ * } <~~ ~ ~ }<<< } }~ < ~ }*< ~< }~~~< }< } * ~ ~ < * * ~* * ~~~~

U j V o VV j o j j U j UV jU V V U o o Vooo V o o Vj oVoooVU VVU V o V UjV o j oo jj o j V jj j o j oUj j V U o U oo j V j j jo o U oVoj U U U V oV U j V j j j V V o jj jVV o o U o j oj ooo o j jV o j j o VV U j U j Vj o j o V U o U jo j V j U j V U j Uj UUUU o U jV o U V j V U UUj V j o U o UUUj U o j U V UUUo U j U UU U UUUUo U o U j VUUV UU o UUo j VUVVUUo V VUVUo o o V UVoUUU VoUUUo U o V o Uo VV U UUUo U o j Voo V o o V j V o Uo o V o UU U Vo VUU V UUUUU U o j VVVjV o V j Vjo

Related People