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Count Olaf

22 quotesCon Artist · Male

All Metaphor Examples (4)Simile Examples (3)School (2)skin (1)Citizen Kane (1)Season (1)Fortune (1)Temple (1)little (1)whack (1)effect (1)Light (1)going for (1)sparkling (1)Fun (1)

From “The Bad Beginning”

If you use fancy-pants words first thing in the morning, you’re going to end up a very lonely man.

fancy pants Morning Lonely Man

Is this about the children? I apologize for the noise. I told them to cry using their inside voices.

Children Apologize noises cry inside voices

Please, come in, and mind you wipe your feet on the mat so you don’t track in any mud. And don’t forget your enormous fortune!

Welcome wipe your feet mud enormous fortune

The stove is a bit like a servant. You have to whack it sometimes to get it to work.

stove Servant whack Work Metaphor Examples

From “The Reptile Room”

Terrible ending. The villagers should have been eaten like in Citizen Kane.

Terrible ending villagers Citizen Kane

From “The Miserable Mill”

Your cruelty is as sweet as this coffee I’m dumping the sugar into.

Cruelty sweet Coffee Sugar

Poor little orphan. Haven’t you learned anything this year? Week? Season?

poor little Orphan Learning week

From “The Austere Academy”

Girls were falling all over me in school, and not just because I would extend my leg when they walked by. I was a lone wolf, a mysterious stranger, a member of the drama club.

Girls School Leg walked by lone wolf

Genius ideas are simple, like the wheel or neurosurgery.

genous Simple wheel Simile Examples neurosurgery

My body is a temple, young man. I would never sully my skin the way so many young people do nowadays with their hedonistic lifestyle of loud music and abstinence.

Body Metaphor Examples Temple skin loud music

My whole life is just going around and around in circles. Like one of those things a hamster plays on before you put it in the oven.

Life around in circles hamster oven

This school has a new kind of spirit energy. A sense of unity and joy which you usually cannot find unless you are at a birthday party or a public hanging.

School spirit energy Unity Joy Metaphor Examples

From “The Ersatz Elevator”

Does this seem like a nightmare? A bad dream? Because that’s the effect I was going for.

Nightmare Bad Dream effect going for

From “The Vile Village”

I thought having prisoners would be fun, but it’s like having a pet or an in-law. You can lock them up, then you have to feed them.

Prisoners Fun in-law pet Feed

Poetry? You’ll stop at nothing to make me talk.

Poetry Stop At Nothing talk

You see, a scheme is like a fire. Everything must be in order for it to work. You need matches, torches, an angry mob that won’t listen to reason, and the right sort of kindling. Orphans, for instance, tied to the wooden stake.

Simile Examples Scheme matches Fire torches

Ah, cocktail hour. When the sky is gold with the promise of fortunes and sparkling with the light of a thousand stolen sapphires.

cocktail hour sky gold Fortune sparkling Light

Parts of the plan were unplanned. That’s the plan. I mean, you don’t want to overplan a plan.

Unplanned plan overplan

Scram, police! Wait, wait! That’s us. Right.

scram Police Right

From “The Hostile Hospital”

It’s time. Let’s lose our first patient.

Time first patient Lose Death

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