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Bruce Campbell Quotes

Total quotes: 17
“Well, Cheryl, it's been fun catching up. Sorry I got to kill you. Again.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Trapped Inside
Tagged: Family, sister, Kill, Murder, Death, Snarky, Sassy, Supernatural
“Life is hard and dangerous, and sometimes you just gotta chop off somebody's head to survive.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Fire in the Hole
Tagged: Life, Murder, Violence, Sassy, Cheeky, Survival, dangerous, joke
“Ash: It's good to be back.

Pablo: How does it feel?

Ash: Groovy.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: El Jefe
Tagged: Groovy, back, humor, Lingo, slang
“Kelly: You know they were Jewish, right?

Ash: I-I did not. Wish you could have said somethin' before I made those dumb crosses, but, okay.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bait
Tagged: Jewish, Religion, funeral, Christianity, Judaism, cross, Graves, Cheeky
“Don't you get it? Everybody dies here. It's just a rule. Death, taxes, more death, and I don't pay taxes. So all I know is death.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Ashes to Ashes
Tagged: Death, Taxes, grim, Pessimistic, realist, rule, Cheeky
“Ladies, I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm not drunk enough to know if this is good weird or bad weird, but I'll get there though!”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Home
Tagged: Drunk, Weird, awkward, tension, Cheeky, Irreverent
“Oh, you need my help? Ok, first of all, screw you and your ugly ass kids.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Home
Tagged: swearing, Insult, Rude, Sassy, Snarky, Screw You, help, ugly
“Suzy: Evil will walk the Earth!

Ash: Yeah, well, your cooking was shit.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bait
Tagged: Evil, Earth, Insult, Rude, Cheeky, Cooking
“Brujo: Come, I'll look inside of you.

Ash: Good, check the old prostate while you're in there?”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Brujo
Tagged: joke, Prostate, Inside, Intimate, awkward, Cheeky
“ I'm gonna be like a ninja losing his virginity, quick and discreet.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: The Morgue
Tagged: joke, Cheeky, Raunchy, Vulgar, Virginity, Ninja, Discreet, Quick, One-Liner
“Ash: Eli! You can speak?!

Eli: In here I can. It's your trip, Jefe.

Ash: Nice, you know I've always wanted to talk to you. Uh, just don't mention the stuff I do in the trailer when we're there alone.

Eli: Never.

Ash: All right then.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Brujo
Tagged: trip, Drugs, Speaking, awkward, Cheeky, joke, Secrets, innuendo
“Ash: Pablo, focus up! Just stay behind me. Let the boomstick do the talkin'. Things get hairy, use your bottle.

Pablo Bolivar: Um, I don't think it's a very good weapon, Jefe. You had to stab Roper like 50 times.

Ash: Hey, I was sharpening it for you.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bait
Tagged: weapon, bottle, Violence, Sharp, Protection, Snarky, Cheeky
“Demon: Your truce is over, Ashy Slashy!

Ash: What'd you call me?

Demon: Ashy Slashy, hatchet and saw, takes your head and skins you raw! Ashy Slashy, heaven or hell, cuts out your tongue so you can't yell...”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Home
Tagged: demon, Fantasy, Supernatural, Nickname, Rhyme, Hell, Violence
“Ash: Lionel, you find a wimpy demon yet?

Lionel: Uh, nothing that says wimpy specifically, but I have found a-a minor demon named Eligos. Possesses knowledge of hidden things, a-a demon of the mindscape.

Ash: Well, perfect. Sounds like a total nerd.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Books from Beyond
Tagged: Demons, Knowledge, Mindscape, nerd, Sassy, bully, Wimpy
“Pablo: Um, but reading from the book is what caused all this trouble to begin with, so...

Ash: Yeah, that's true, but reading from it again can't make things any worse. It's kinda like spilling paint on a painting. It's okay 'cause there's already paint on it.

Pablo: That is incorrect.”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Books from Beyond
Tagged: Incorrect, ignorant, Stupid, book, Reading, trouble, paint, Painting, Cheeky
“Brisco County Jr.: Which one of you is Aristotle Poole?

Socrates Poole: That's Socrates Poole.

Brisco County Jr.: Oh, sorry. I guess that's a common mistake.

Socrates Poole: Not at all.

Brisco County Jr.: Well, it is if you flunked Greek philosophy two years in a row.”
— Brisco County, Jr., The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr., Season 1: Pilot
Tagged: Aristotle, Socrates, Greek, Philosophers, humor, joke, Sassy
“Ash: Well, now that you're back, what's your big plan?

Suzy: Well, just try to get everything back to normal.

Ash: Normal? Ha. What's normal?

Suzy: Family, work.

Ash: Work? Work, where?

Suzy: Oh, I'm an English teacher.

Ash: What grade?

Suzy: Tenth.

Ash: What's your favorite book?

Suzy: 'The Old Man and the Sea.'

Ash: Oh, so you like fishing.

Mr. Maxwell: I like fishing!

Ash: This ain't about you, dad!”
— Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bait
Tagged: Old Man And The Sea, Literature, book, Teacher, School, Work, Family, Fishing, Cheeky, joke
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