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M.J. Pack

146 Quotes
Horror writer for Creepy Catalog, ESFP, Kylo Ren advocate, Slytherin, sassbasket.
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146 quotes curated by M.J. Pack:

“For the sake of decency, gentlemen, don't hang me high.”
— Mary Blandy, Last Words From 5 Famous Female Murderers
Tagged: creepy, serial killer, Murder, murderer, Last Words
“A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads:
'Watch your head.'”
— bored_ouvvihh, A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads... • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, funny joke, guy walks into a bar, joke
“A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads.
'Hey,' says the man to the sign, 'If you can read, what does my shirt say?'
'I don't know,' says the sign. 'I can only read sign language.'”
— why-the, A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads... • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, funny joke, guy walks into a bar
“A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00
He checks his wallet and beckons to the sexy bartender.
'Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?' he asks.
'Yes,' she purrs. 'I am.'
'Well, wash your fuckin' hands,' says the man. 'I want a chicken sandwich!'”
— HairyAssquatch, A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads... • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, guy walks into a bar, funny joke
“Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, but I'll take a peanut if you have any.”
— dagodon, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes
“Knock knock!
Who's there?
Felix!
Felix who?
Felix my ice-cream again I'll smack 'im!”
— nofelix, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes
“Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting "Completely Uncalled For."
Interrup-
(at this point, punch/slap the victim in the face and make a quick getaway)”
— fkwillrice, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes
“Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say 'Banana?'”
— SlowMovingTarget, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes
“Knock knock.
Who's there?
Godzilla.
Godzilla who?
Just kidding, Godzilla wouldn't knock.”
— Quellman, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes
“Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Abe!
Abe who?
Abe C D E F G...”
— savagepika, Shy 6 year old needs your knock knock jokes! • /r/Jokes
Tagged: Funny, joke, knock knock, knock knock jokes