Reese Bobby: [walks into the classroom] Excuse me, darling. I'm Reese Bobby. I'm here for career day with my son, Ricky.

10-year-old Ricky: Dad!

Reese Bobby: Hey there, boy! Man, you got big. How long's it been? Three, four months?

10-year-old Ricky: Ten years.

Reese Bobby: Ten years? Man, I gotta lay off the peyote. [puts a cigarette in his mouth]

Schoolteacher: Mr. Bobby, there's no smoking in here.

Reese Bobby: Oh, it's all right, darling, I'm a volunteer fireman. OK, I am a semi-professional race car driver and an amateur tattoo artist.

Classmates: OOOOHHHH!

Reese Bobby: And the first thing you gotta learn if you're gonna be a race car driver, is that you don't listen to losers like your know-it-all teacher here.

Schoolteacher: Okay, I think that's enough.

Reese Bobby: Your teacher wants you to go slow, and she's wrong because it's the fastest who get paid and it's the fastest who get laid. [classmates all cheer]

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This page was created by our editorial team. Each page is manually curated, researched, collected, and issued by our staff writers. Quotes contained on this page have been double checked for their citations, their accuracy and the impact it will have on our readers.

Kelly Peacock is an accomplished poet and social media expert based in Brooklyn, New York. Kelly has a Bachelor's degree in creative writing from Farieligh Dickinson University and has contributed to many literary and cultural publications. Kelly assists on a wide variety of quote inputting and social media functions for Quote Catalog. Visit her personal website here.

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