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Josh Siegal Quotes

Total quotes: 3
“Don't worry about me. I'm like a biscotti. People act like I'm this sweet cookie, but I'm really this super hard thing that nobody knows what I am or why I am.”
— Kimmy Schmidt, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Season 2: Kimmy Gives Up!
Tagged: biscotti, Cookies, Mystery
“Chidi: I just want to have a little chat about your progress. In the last homework assignment, I asked you to examine the ethics of 'Les Misérables,' in which a man steals a loaf of bread to feed his starving family. Would you please read your first paragraph here?

Michael: 'Everyone in this story sucks and belongs in the Bad Place. The thief is bad. The officer chasing him is bad. All the whiny prostitutes are bad. Plus, they're all French, so they're going to the Bad Place automatically.'

Chidi: Do you see how you're already off topic?

Michael: Chidi, I've been around a long time like, all of it. But I know for a fact that if you steal a loaf of bread, it's a negative 17 points, 20 if it's a baguette because that makes you more French.”
— Michael, The Good Place, Season 2: The Trolley Problem
Tagged: Les Misérables, Pop Culture, french, Philosophy, The Bad Place, Hell, Theft, Class, School
“Michael: So to prepare to meet all of you, I studied the human concept of friends. I even watched all ten seasons of the show 'Friends'. Boy, those friends really were friends, weren't they? Although — and I realize this is the kind of observation that would only occur to the mind of an eternal being — how did they afford that apartment? A waitress and a chef with those Manhattan real estate prices.

Eleanor: Yeah, we were all confused about that too.”
— Michael, The Good Place, Season 1: What We Owe to Each Other
Tagged: Friends, Pop Culture, TV Shows, joke, Heaven, Eternal Being, Friendship
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