Elizabeth Hackett Quotes

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Elizabeth Hackett

Elizabeth Hackett

Birthname

AKA Elizabeth Hackett

Occupations Screenwriter

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Nobody works harder than a drunk person trying to carefully whisper a secret.

— Elizabeth Hackett, via twitter.com

Funny Quotes Drunk Drinking Going Out Friends

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A good way to get to know your date is to ask about their first pet, favorite movie & mom’s maiden name, then login & read all their emails.

— Christopher Hudspeth, via twitter.com

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The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

— Demetri Martin, Demetri Martin Jokes | Comedy Central Stand-Up | Demetri Martin: Worst Time for a Heart Attack

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What do you say to a herb that’s running late? It’s about thyme!

— Maria Monrovia, 50 Food Puns To Dish Out When You’re Hungry For Laughs

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What did Taylor Swift say to the melon? Look what you made me dew!

— Maria Monrovia, 50 Food Puns To Dish Out When You’re Hungry For Laughs

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Did you hear the joke about the peanut butter? I’m not telling you. You might spread it!

— Maria Monrovia, 50 Food Puns To Dish Out When You’re Hungry For Laughs

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I met some chess players in a hotel lobby. They were bragging about how good they were. It was chess nuts bragging in an open foyer.

— porichoygupto, I met some chess players in the hotel lobby. They were bragging about how good they are.

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Getting older is pretty much just paying bills and finally understanding why killers in horror flicks target teenagers.

— Kendra Alve, via twitter.com

Funny Quotes Scary Movies Horror Flicks teenagers Paying Bills Growing Up Adulthood

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If cats could text you back, they wouldn't.

— Audrey Porne, via twitter.com

Funny Quotes cats Texting Pets

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